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Public libraries should provide books and not waste their limited resources on expensive high-tech media such as software, videos or DVDs. v.3

Public libraries should provide books and not waste their limited resources on expensive high-tech media such as software, videos or DVDs. v. 3
It is a fact that public libraries are present in almost all cities across the globe, due to its emerging needs. In addition to let reading and selling books, most of the libraries have digital media like software, videos and DVDs. I refute that on top of providing books, libraries should not the rovide latest media to the users. This can be proven by analysing how libraries can attract youths as well as have an advanced effect, by having the option of lending latest technological media. Firstly, by providing latest media in libraries, a lot of youngsters will be interested in coming to the library, as they are very comfortable with using the latest technology. For example, consider the software which helps in learning a language. For the young people who are comfortable in using computers can learn the language within very less time, as the software acts as a very good guide. If the same task has to be accomplished by a book, people would find it very difficult as there is no feedback. Thus, it is obvious that by lending latest technology in libraries, can be advantageous. Secondly, high technological media can give advance effect as it can be played on the appropriate gadget. For instance, a DVD player has an option to stream the video and it can have the appropriate sound effect. Moreover, it has an option to start, stop and move forward or backwards at any time. Books cannot have any additional effect. Hence, it is clear why lending latest technological media in the library is worth. The present era is the blessing of technology and these technological advancements should be embraced as many ways as possible. We are not talking about replacing books by using technological advancement, rather we are talking about adding the benefits that the technology can offer in a library where more people would come and get better facility and learning environment. Hence, spending money for technological benefits in a library is never a waste of money. By analysing how lending latest technological media in libraries can help more youngsters attracted as well as can have special effects, it is considered that libraries must provide updated media. It is predicted that the government will give financial support to the libraries to have the latest media.
It is a fact that public libraries are present in almost all cities across the globe, due to its emerging needs.
In addition
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
reading and selling
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
, most of the libraries have digital
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
like software, videos and DVDs. I refute that on top of providing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
, libraries should not the
Possible spelling mistake found.
rovide
A determiner is probably missing here: "the latest".
latest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
to the users. This can
be proven
by
Possible spelling mistake. 'analysing' is British English.
analysing
how libraries can attract youths
as well
as have an advanced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
effect
, by having the option of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lending
A determiner is probably missing here: "the latest".
latest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technological
media.

Firstly
, by providing
A determiner is probably missing here: "the latest".
latest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
in libraries,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
youngsters will
be interested
in coming to the library, as they are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
Consider using "comfortable using".
comfortable with using
the latest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
.
For example
, consider the software which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
in learning a language. For the young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who are comfortable in using computers can learn the language within
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
less time, as the software acts as a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
guide. If the same task
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
be accomplished
by a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
book
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
would find it
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
difficult as there is no feedback.
Thus
, it is obvious that by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lending
A determiner is probably missing here: "the latest".
latest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
in libraries, can be advantageous.

Secondly
, high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technological
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
can give advance
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
effect
as it can
be played
on the appropriate gadget.
For instance
, a DVD player has an option to stream the video and it can have the appropriate sound
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
effect
.
Moreover
, it has an option to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
forward or backwards at any time.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Books
cannot have any additional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
effect
.
Hence
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lending
A determiner is probably missing here: "the latest".
latest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technological
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
in the library is worth.

The present era is the blessing of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
and these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technological
advancements should
be embraced
as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
ways as possible. We are not talking about replacing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
by using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technological
advancement,
rather
we are talking about adding the benefits that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
can offer in a library where more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
better facility and learning environment.
Hence
, spending money for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technological
benefits in a library is never a waste of money.

By
Possible spelling mistake. 'analysing' is British English.
analysing
how
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lending
A determiner is probably missing here: "the latest".
latest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technological
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
in libraries can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
more youngsters attracted
as well
as can have special effects, it
is considered
that libraries
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
provide updated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
. It
is predicted
that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
will give financial support to the libraries to have the latest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
32Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Mistakes

IELTS essay Public libraries should provide books and not waste their limited resources on expensive high-tech media such as software, videos or DVDs. v. 3

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
384 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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