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Private car ownership has been increasing over the past few decades. This has given ordinary people greater mobility, but has also led to concerns about traffic congestion and air pollution. Do the advantages of private car ownership outweigh the disadvantages?

Private car ownership has been increasing over the past few decades. This has given ordinary people greater mobility, but has also led to concerns about traffic congestion and air pollution. Do the advantages of private car ownership outweigh the disadvantages? oRkxb
It is easy to understand that owning a private car will give owners a great flexibility in travelling. However, some people concern about the negative impacts of that on the environment and society. I totally agree with this opinion as the disadvantages of private car ownership is much greater than its advantages. Firstly, let’s talk about its internal factors to owner. The cost paid for a car is not cheap. It can range from 10000$ up to 100000$. An average income earner is not easy to afford that price. Moreover, the costs-associated like maintenance or road charges are hassles that the owner has to face. Renting a car spot is not cheap either, especially in big cities where the fee for a parking spot is extremely high. Hence, The accumulated expenditures for owning a private car will surely make consumer to rethink about their decision. Secondly is the external factors. The rising trend in private car ownership means that there will be less people using public transports like bus and train. The expense to maintain the operations of public transport still remains while no one cares to use it. Consequently, it will leave a huge burden on authority’s shoulder as they might have to spend money on unnecessary things. In addition, emissions from private cars will quickly destroy the environment and break the ozone layers which protect people from the harmful ultraviolet rays. All in all, authorities need to do something towards this rising trend as the way to protect the environment and economy. Encouraging citizens to switch from using private vehicles to public vehicles will bring a lot of benefits to society.
It is easy to understand that owning a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
will give owners a great flexibility in travelling.
However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
concern about the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impacts of that on the environment and society. I
totally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this opinion as the disadvantages of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
ownership is much greater than its advantages.

Firstly
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
’s talk about its internal factors to owner. The cost paid for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cheap
. It can range from
The currency mark is usually put at the beginning of the number: "$10000".
10000$
up to
The currency mark is usually put at the beginning of the number: "$100000".
100000$
. An average income earner is not easy to afford that price.
Moreover
, the costs-associated like maintenance or road charges are hassles that the owner
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
face. Renting a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
spot is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cheap
either,
especially
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
cities where the fee for a parking spot is
extremely
high.
Hence
, The accumulated expenditures for owning a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
will
surely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
consumer to rethink about their decision.

Secondly
is the external factors. The rising trend in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
ownership means that there will be
Did you mean "fewer"? The noun people is countable.
less
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
using public transports like bus and train. The expense to maintain the operations of public transport
still
remains while no one cares to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
it.
Consequently
, it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
a huge burden on authority’s shoulder as they might
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
spend money on unnecessary things.
In addition
, emissions from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
will
quickly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroy
the environment and break the ozone layers which protect
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
from the harmful ultraviolet rays.

All in all, authorities need to do something towards this rising trend as the way to protect the environment and economy. Encouraging citizens to switch from using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
vehicles to public vehicles will bring
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
benefits to society.
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IELTS essay Private car ownership has been increasing over the past few decades. This has given ordinary people greater mobility, but has also led to concerns about traffic congestion and air pollution. Do the advantages of private car ownership outweigh the disadvantages?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
273 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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