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Prison is the common way in most countries to try to solve the problem of crime. However, a more effective solution is to provide people with better education. Do you agree or disagree?

Prison is the common way in most countries to try to solve the problem of crime. However, a more effective solution is to provide people with better education. oQbB
As the world is heading towards the global crisis, goods and products are also getting expensive and this leads to crimes like robbery and kidnapping, or murder. Though prison is made to help the country become a better place to live in this is not the only solution to the problem as providing education can also make the country crime-free. This idea does seem feasible and I agree with it. Education helps a person gain knowledge which eventually leads him/her to a better future by working hard. Firstly, providing education helps people to understand the market which helps them to build their own business. Secondly, more crimes are done by illiterate people because of a lack of knowledge of the global market and not knowing how to make money legally. So education is the solution where the people living in the country would gain knowledge and understand that doing crimes would often end up in jail. Furthermore, providing education would help them to learn and eventually would end up in getting the desired job. Though some crimes are done by educated and literate people because of greed for more money. However, some crimes need proper punishments like life imprisonment and sentenced to death because that is the only way the criminals and the population of the country would understand that they should not indulge in any crime. For instance, the official crime record states that rapes are increasing by a rate of 6% every year and the women living in the country do not feel safe and secure. This type of crime only has one solution that is by sentencing the rapists hanged to death as by doing so, other criminals like these would think twice before doing such a nuisance crime. To conclude, it can be commented that, education is an effective solution which should be provided by the government to all the citizens so they would not engage in such crimes and they would work hard and earn money by their skills. Though some crimes are such an offense that the only solution is to put them behind the bars.
As the world is heading towards the global crisis,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
and products are
also
getting expensive and this leads to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
like robbery and kidnapping, or murder. Though prison
is made
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
become a better place to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in this is not the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
solution
to the problem as providing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
can
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
crime-free. This
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
does seem feasible and I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with it.

Education
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
a person gain knowledge which
eventually
leads him/her to a better future by working
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
.
Firstly
, providing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to understand the market which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
them to build their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
business.
Secondly
, more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
are done
by illiterate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of a lack of knowledge of the global market and not knowing how to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
money
legally
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
solution
where the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
living in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
would gain knowledge and understand that doing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
would
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
up in jail.
Furthermore
, providing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
would
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
them to learn and
eventually
would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
up in getting the desired job. Though
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
are done
by educated and literate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of greed for more money.

However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
need proper punishments like life imprisonment and sentenced to death
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
that is
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
way the criminals and the population of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
would understand that they should not indulge in any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
.
For instance
, the official
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
record states that rapes are increasing by a rate of 6% every year and the women living in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
do not feel safe and secure. This type of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
has one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
solution
that is
by sentencing the rapists hanged to death as by doing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
, other criminals like these would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
twice
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
doing such a nuisance crime.

To conclude
, it can
be commented
that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is an effective
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
solution
which should
be provided
by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
to all the citizens
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they would not engage in such
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
crimes and
they would work
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
and earn money by their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.
“Though” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Though
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
are such an offense that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
solution
is to put them behind the bars.
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IELTS essay Prison is the common way in most countries to try to solve the problem of crime. However, a more effective solution is to provide people with better education.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
352 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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