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"Prevention is better than cure". Researching and treating diseases is too costly. So, it would be better to invest in preventive measurements. To what extend do you agree?

"Prevention is better than cure". Researching and treating diseases is too costly. So, it would be better to invest in preventive measurements. GMrAw
For the health of an individual, precautionary steps play a huge role before getting ill from diseases. Thus, i agree to invest on healthy lifestyle like joining exercise centers and reducing stress level. Firstly, in today's busy life and plethora of other reasons, it is very tough for someone to maintain their healthy lifestyle. Although working hard for hours on a daily basis, eaten food doesn't get enough time for proper digestion. This leads to many kinds of stomach infections, diseases and obesity. In order to prevent an individual from getting ill, it is very important to do regular exercise at places like gymnasium and exercise centre and in parks. Doing regular exercise, reduces possibility of being fat and improves the immune system. For instance, a city council of ahmedabad has invested in renovation of 25 existing gyms and inaugurated 10 fitness centers in ahmedabad in the year 2020 after pandemic of covid-19 where citizens can join for free and make their selves fit. In addition to this, an investment of time on reducing the stress of today is prosperous than invitation to cardiac, blood pressure and other mental diseases in future. Due to facing abundance of work burden, it is surveyed to seen higher numbers of patients of heart and blood pressure at clinic for treatments. In spite of taking enough sleep, they can not feel their self free from stress. Thus, spending time in laughter clubs and gatherings reduces the threat of illnesses. As per the survey of government of maharastra, patients of mental illness have increased by 30% in the year 2020 comparing with the year 2015. Thus, government has hired coaches and scheduled a laughter classes in every parks and gardens of the city mumbai. In conclusion, "late than never" to the prevention of pandemic is always better than being suffer. So, investing time and money for better and healthy lifestyle is beneficial to an individual and society.
For the health of an individual, precautionary steps play a huge role
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
getting ill from diseases.
Thus
,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
to invest on healthy lifestyle like joining
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
centers and reducing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
level.

Firstly
, in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's busy life and plethora of other reasons, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
tough for someone to maintain their healthy lifestyle. Although working
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
for hours on a daily basis, eaten food doesn't
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
for proper digestion. This leads to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
kinds of stomach infections, diseases and obesity. In order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
an individual from getting ill, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to do regular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
at places like gymnasium and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
Possible spelling mistake. 'centre' is British English.
centre
and in parks. Doing regular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduces
possibility of being
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fat
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improves
the immune system.
For instance
, a city council of
Possible spelling mistake found.
ahmedabad
has invested in renovation of 25 existing gyms and inaugurated 10 fitness centers in
Possible spelling mistake found.
ahmedabad
in the year 2020 after pandemic of
Did you mean "COVID-19" or the alternative spelling "Covid-19" (= coronavirus)?
covid-19
where citizens can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
join
for free and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
their selves fit.

In addition
to this, an investment of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on reducing the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
is
Use "(prosperous)" to make a comparison with this adjective.
prosperous
than invitation to cardiac, blood pressure and other mental diseases
Did you mean: "in the future"?
in future
. Due to facing abundance of work burden, it
is surveyed
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
higher numbers of patients of heart and blood pressure at clinic for treatments.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
In spite of
taking
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
sleep, they can not feel their self free from
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
.
Thus
, spending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
in laughter clubs and gatherings
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduces
the threat of illnesses. As per the survey of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
of
Possible spelling mistake found.
maharastra
, patients of mental illness have increased by 30% in the year 2020 comparing with the year 2015.
Thus
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
has hired coaches and scheduled a laughter classes in every
The noun should be probably in the singular form: "park"?
parks
and gardens of the city
Possible spelling mistake found.
mumbai
.

In conclusion
,
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
Use "later" to make a comparison with this adjective.
late
than never
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
to the prevention of pandemic is always better than being
Consider using a past participle here: "suffered".
suffer
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, investing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and money for better and healthy lifestyle is beneficial to an individual and society.
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IELTS essay "Prevention is better than cure". Researching and treating diseases is too costly. So, it would be better to invest in preventive measurements.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
322 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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