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Present a written argument to an educated reader with no specialist knowledge of the following topic: Safety standards are important when building people's homes. Who should be responsible for enforcing strict building codes – the government or the v.1

Present a written argument to an educated reader with no specialist knowledge of the following topic: Safety standards are important when building people's homes. Who should be responsible for enforcing strict building codes – the government or the v. 1
Safety procedures are very essential for the construction of residential building. In my opinion, the government is the one who is approving the plans and designs of the house. So they are fully responsible for the safety measures for the real estate. Firstly, the residential buildings need pre approval from the ruling party to initiate the construction. The person is submitting all the required documents for plan and location to the municipality are used to visit the place to check any controversy with the residential building standard or any violation with the ruler and regulation of constructing houses. After that, the government provides sanction to proceed the construction. This is the methodology going in my hometown. So from this, the government is fully answerable for all causes would happen, not the civilians. Secondly, the civilians who are constructing the apartment are responsible only for the materials which uses for the building and the interior architecture. In developed countries, the corporation have their own safety procedures and construction codes to build the residential buildings. For example, on October 1989, the resident in Newyork build a house in his/her registered land. He got admitted all the documents needed for the construction including safety precaution. But unfortunately, the building was collapsed after two years. Because the soil in that particular location was not suitable to withstand the building mass and the foundation was not grasped with the base of the apartment. This case was taken to the government for justice. After the investigation, the government announced that the officer who did not do follow the safety rules for that apartment. The government took over the responsibility and paid all money to the resident. In the conclusion, the corporation or municipality are the main concern to implement the standards and safety rules to the residents who are constructing the homes, not the civilians.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Safety
procedures are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
essential for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
construction
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
residential
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
. In my opinion, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
is the one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
is approving the plans and designs of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
they are
fully
responsible for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
safety
measures for the real estate.

Firstly
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
residential
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
need
This word is normally spelled as one.
pre approval
from the ruling party to initiate the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
construction
. The person is submitting all the required documents for plan and location to the municipality are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to visit the place to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
any controversy with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
residential
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
standard or any violation with the ruler and regulation of constructing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
. After that, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
provides sanction to proceed the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
construction
. This is the methodology going in my hometown.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
from this, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
is
fully
answerable for all causes would happen, not the civilians.

Secondly
, the civilians
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are constructing the apartment are responsible
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
for the materials which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
uses
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
and the interior architecture. In
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developed countries
, the corporation have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
safety
procedures and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
construction
codes to build the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
residential
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
.
For example
, on October 1989, the resident in
Possible spelling mistake found.
Newyork
build a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
in his/her registered land. He
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
admitted all the documents needed for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
construction
including
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
safety
precaution.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
unfortunately, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
was collapsed
after two years.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
the soil in that particular location was not suitable to withstand the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
mass and the foundation was not grasped with the base of the apartment. This case
was taken
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
for justice. After the investigation, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
announced that the officer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
did not do follow the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
safety
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
for that apartment. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
took over the responsibility and paid all money to the resident.

In the conclusion, the corporation or municipality are the main concern to implement the standards and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
safety
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
to the residents
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are constructing the homes, not the civilians.
3Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
32Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Present a written argument to an educated reader with no specialist knowledge of the following topic: Safety standards are important when building people's homes. Who should be responsible for enforcing strict building codes – the government or the v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
309 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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