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Popular event like football WorldCup and others international sporting occasions are essential in easing international tensions and releasing patriotic emotion in a safe way. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.1

Popular event like football WorldCup and others international sporting occasions are essential in easing international tensions and releasing patriotic emotion in a safe way. v. 1
With the rapid progress of technology, some people believe that there will not be a need for translators in the future. I completely disagree with this statement and this essay will explain the reasons why. The main disadvantage of using technology for translation is that it has proven to be inaccurate when it comes to handling more complicated sentence structures. For instance, there have been embarrassing cases whereby people have relied on an online translator at work only to have their overseas correspondent correcting them. This shows the limitation of computer programs in bridging the language gap. Furthermore, fully relying on translating software only erodes the beauty and causes disrespect for the language and the culture that it represents. While one might argue that translating software might serve as a helpful aid for tourists, it cannot allow them to fully comprehend the meaning of what the other person is trying to communicate. The tourist could only rely on picking up key words and gestures, which might be ineffective. In addition, it has been observed that people who join tour groups with a translator are able to enjoy their holiday with a stress free experience as compared to a free and easy traveller who ventured on their own without any knowledge of its vernacular. Further emphasizing my point, I believe that the requirements for a person to be fully proficient in a foreign language will not change. The future could observe a shift in the paradigm of an official translator role, but the demands of being fluent in another mother tongue will remain and could evolve into more multi-faceted roles as our economy progresses. In conclusion, translators and interpreters still form an integral role in our society. The number of translating jobs may shrink due to the advancement in technology, but the demand to be fluent in another mother tongue will still remain essential. A software only serves as an aid in providing certain vocabulary, but it cannot replace the role of an interpreter.
With the rapid progress of technology,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that there will not be a need for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
translators
in the future. I completely disagree with this statement and this essay will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
the reasons why.

The main disadvantage of using technology for translation is that it has proven to be inaccurate when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to handling more complicated sentence structures.
For instance
, there have been embarrassing cases whereby
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
have relied on an online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
translator
at work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
to have their overseas correspondent correcting them. This
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
the limitation of computer programs in bridging the language gap.
Furthermore
,
fully
relying on translating software
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
erodes the beauty and causes disrespect for the language and the culture that it represents.

While one might argue that translating software might serve as a helpful aid for tourists, it cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
them to
fully
comprehend the meaning of what the other person is trying to communicate. The tourist could
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
rely on picking up
Did you mean "keywords"?
key words
and gestures, which might be ineffective.
In addition
, it has
been observed
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
join
tour groups with a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
translator
are able to enjoy their holiday with a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
free experience as compared to a free and easy
Possible spelling mistake found.
traveller
who ventured on their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
without any knowledge of its vernacular.

Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Further
emphasizing my point, I believe that the requirements for a person to be
fully
proficient in a foreign language will not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
. The future could observe a shift in the paradigm of an official
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
translator
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
role
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the demands of being fluent in another mother tongue will remain and could evolve into more multi-faceted
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roles
as our economy progresses.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
translators
and interpreters
still
form an integral
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
role
in our society. The number of translating jobs may shrink due to the advancement in technology,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the demand to be fluent in another mother tongue will
still
remain essential. A software
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
serves as an aid in providing certain vocabulary,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it cannot replace the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
role
of an interpreter.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
Knowledge of languages is the doorway to wisdom.
Roger Bacon

IELTS essay Popular event like football WorldCup and others international sporting occasions are essential in easing international tensions and releasing patriotic emotion in a safe way. v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
333 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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