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Persuade people to reduce the deforestation

Persuade people to reduce the deforestation 96597
Did you know that the rate of deforestation was eliminated at 10 million hectares every year? Agricultural expansion and the development of science and technology are the reasons for deforestation. Based on people’s requirements, a lot of trees are cut to produce paper, furniture and to expand the construction area. There are a few people who after cutting down trees, have plans to plant new trees. Therefore, I’m going to explain why this is such a problem for the world and why we need to save trees. Deforestation causes a lot of bad effects in our environment. If the amount of trees decreases very fast, there will be nothing left to regulate climate and the climate change will happen. The habitants of animals also disappear and it can even result in the death of somes animals. Equally important, people will lose a massive amount of oxygen. According to scientists, On average, trees absorb about 21. 7 kg of CO2 and produce 15. 83 kg of O2 per year. Trees also have the benefit of blocking the flow of water so that deforestation can cause floods and landslides which make a big impact on people’s lives. To protect our life and save the Earth, we need to do forest protection and denounce acts of deforestation. If this can be done, we will have a safe place to live.
Did you know that the rate of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
deforestation
was eliminated
at 10 million hectares every year? Agricultural expansion and the development of science and technology are the reasons for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
deforestation
. Based on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
requirements,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trees
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cut
to produce paper, furniture and to expand the construction area. There are a few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who after cutting down
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trees
, have plans to plant new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trees
.
Therefore
, I’m going to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
why this is such a problem for the world and why we need to save trees.

Deforestation causes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
effects in our environment. If the amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trees
decreases
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
, there will be nothing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
to regulate climate and the climate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
will happen. The habitants of animals
also
disappear and it can even result in the death of
Possible spelling mistake found.
somes
animals.

Equally
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will lose a massive amount of oxygen. According to scientists, On average,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trees
absorb about 21. 7 kg of CO2 and produce 15. 83 kg of O2 per year.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Trees
also
have the benefit of blocking the flow of water
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
deforestation
can cause floods and landslides which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
impact on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.

To protect our life and save the Earth, we need to do forest protection and denounce acts of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
deforestation
. If this can
be done
, we will have a safe place to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
.
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IELTS essay Persuade people to reduce the deforestation

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
227 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
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