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Permanent station on venus

Permanent station on venus aw6dG
Both the reading passage and listening discuss whether the human being can stay on venus or not. The author declares that nobody can stay there. However, the professor finds all the reading's ideas dubious and presents some evidence to reject them all. he says that it is possible to create a station like a balloon 50 kilometers above the surface of venus for this purpose. Firstly, the reading states that since in the atmosphere of Venus, the pressure is higher than in the Earth, humans may be crushed. In contrast, the professor casts doubt on this point by saying that this problem is solvable using this station. therefore, the people will be safe from being crushed in this station because in this case, the pressure is not too much to crush the humans. Secondly, the reading passage explains that there are no water and oxygen there, and carrying them to venus is not feasible. On the contrary. the professor dismisses this point by saying that there are other chemicals such as carbon dioxide, nitrogen, and sulfuric acid. therefore, water and oxygen easily created from chemical processes using these materials. As a result, humans do not have to carry water and oxygen to venus. Finally. the reading passage mentions that the low percentage of sunlight reaches the surface of Venus, so humans are not able to produce electrical power from the sun for supplying their power. Conversely, the professor in spite of proving the low-level of sun power says that the carbon dioxide clouds do not too thick not to use the power of the sun in this station. he adds that the solar cells not only can attract power directly from the sun but also can receive reflected lights of thick clouds below the station. Thus, humans can produce electricity for applied usages.
Both the
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reading
passage and listening discuss whether the
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human
being can stay on
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venus
or not. The author declares that nobody can stay there.
However
, the
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professor
finds all the reading's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
dubious and presents
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
evidence to reject them all.
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he
says that it is possible to create a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
station
like a balloon 50 kilometers above the surface of
Possible spelling mistake found.
venus
for this purpose.

Firstly
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
states that since in the atmosphere of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Venus
, the pressure is higher than in the Earth,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
may
be crushed
.
In contrast
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professor
casts doubt on this point by saying that this problem is solvable using this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
station
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
therefore
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
will be safe from
being crushed
in this
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station
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
in this case
, the pressure is not too much to crush the humans.

Secondly
, the
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reading
passage
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explains
that there are no water and oxygen there, and carrying them to
Possible spelling mistake found.
venus
is not feasible.
On the contrary
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professor
dismisses this point by saying that there are other chemicals such as carbon dioxide, nitrogen, and sulfuric acid.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
therefore
, water and oxygen
easily
created from chemical processes using these materials.
As a result
,
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humans
do not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
carry water and oxygen to
Possible spelling mistake found.
venus
.

Finally
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
passage mentions that the low percentage of sunlight reaches the surface of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Venus
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
are not able to produce electrical
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power
from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sun
for supplying their
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power
.
Conversely
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professor
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
in spite of
proving the low-level of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sun
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
power
says that the carbon dioxide clouds do not too thick not to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
power
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sun
in this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
station
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
he
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
adds
that the solar cells not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
can attract
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power
directly
from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sun
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
can receive reflected lights of thick clouds below the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
station
.
Thus
,
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humans
can produce electricity for applied usages.
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IELTS essay Permanent station on venus

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
303 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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