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Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? People who work in public services, such as doctors, nurses and teachers, should earn more money than people who are paid to entertain, like actors and sports stars. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

People who work in public services, such as doctors, nurses and teachers, should earn more money than people who are paid to entertain, like actors and sports stars. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. drW1K
Recently, there has been a ton of debate about the importance of certain kind of works in the society. Many people think that medical or education workers should earn more money in compairison to whom in the industry of entertainment and sport. I strongly agree with this point of view, and I will develop the reasons of my position in the subsequent paragraphs. To begin with, in my humble opinion, the personnel in medical and educational systems such as physicians, nurses and teachers are fundamental for the perennity of our current society in opposition of actors or sportifs. For instance, doctors and nurses are required in order to provide the adequate medical cares for mental and physical sick people. The kind of support that their give to people demand many years of study to acquire the sufficient knowledge and skill. Not you want can perform medical care. Or without care, we cannot probably be in live at the moment. In regard of this, medical staff are important. The teacher are the educator, their are in front of line when we are talking about education, since the elementary school to the University. Without them, no intellectual career, no doctors, no nurse and consequently no society. In the opposite, it is possible to imagine a society without films or sports events, it could be borring, but existing. Second, the employment of public services demand a lot of sacrifice, and gain more money to save the life or educate people can be a way to award worker and show them gratitude. Indeed, for instance, my uncle and his wife are both of them doctors in pediatrie for our hospital village. Their chose this area of study because their are fond of children since their teenager phase. In regard of the huge sacrifice of their work, many hours in operating blocs, work at night, their take the difficult decision to not have children. This decision was impacted severely their live, so a financial reawarding, even if it could not change their decision or make them more happy, could just be a manner to show that society is proud of them. To end off, the entertain workers are important for society but not necesary. It would be beneficial to rehause the stipend of public workers, in regard of their devotion, as a kind of support.
Recently, there has been a ton of debate about the importance of certain kind of works in the
society
.
Many
people
think
that
medical
or education
workers
should earn more money in
compairison
to whom in the industry of entertainment and sport. I
strongly
agree
with this point of view, and I will develop the reasons of my position in the subsequent paragraphs. To
begin
with, in my humble opinion, the personnel in
medical
and educational systems such as physicians, nurses and teachers are fundamental for the
perennity
of our
current
society
in opposition of actors or
sportifs
.
For instance
, doctors and nurses
are required
in order to provide the adequate
medical
cares for mental and physical sick
people
. The kind of support that their give to
people
demand
many
years of study to acquire the sufficient knowledge and
skill
. Not you want can perform
medical
care. Or without care, we cannot
probably
be in
live
at the moment. In regard of this,
medical
staff are
important
. The teacher
are
the educator,
their
are in front of line when we are talking about education, since the elementary school to the University. Without them, no intellectual career, no doctors, no nurse and
consequently
no
society
. In the opposite, it is possible to imagine a
society
without films or sports
events
, it could be
borring
,
but
existing. Second, the employment of public services demand
a lot of
sacrifice, and gain more money to save the life or educate
people
can be a way to award
worker
and
show
them gratitude.
Indeed
,
for instance
, my uncle and his wife are both of them doctors in
pediatrie
for our hospital village. Their chose this area of study
because
their
are fond of children since their
teenager
phase. In regard of the huge sacrifice of their work,
many
hours in operating blocs, work at night, their take the difficult decision to not have children. This decision
was impacted
severely
their
live
,
so
a financial
reawarding
, even if it could not
change
their decision or
make
them more happy, could
just
be a manner to
show
that
society
is proud of them. To
end
off,
the entertain
workers
are
important
for
society
but
not
necesary
. It would be beneficial to
rehause
the stipend of public
workers
, in regard of their devotion, as a kind of support.
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IELTS essay People who work in public services, such as doctors, nurses and teachers, should earn more money than people who are paid to entertain, like actors and sports stars. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
390 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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