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People tend to relax in stead of working and studying

People tend to relax in stead of working and studying ke7Vn

It is argued that people spend a lot of time in their daily basis to entertain and relax in lieu of seeking for opportunities in the future by studying or working diligently. Nevertheless, I personally believe that with the hectic world, few adults and children have a tendency to persist maintaining sedentary lifestyles, instead, they are inclined to strive to expend their time on studying and working. First of all, students yearn for being the best version of themselves by absorbing and figure out as much knowledge as possible. In other words, studying day and night is one of the most popular activities of students in this era. As a result, the rivalry has risen in the schools and particularly amongst learners in classes. Every person has to try a lot to have flying colours and compliments from teachers or professors. So, there are lots of youngsters use more than four hours a day just for doing homework and preparing the next lessons. This phenomenon also happen in working condition, workers and even their bosses try to work hard more than eight hours a day. Indeed, the depression to have different skills to avoid the replacement of artificial intelligence urge everybody irrespective of their careers or generations. For instance, employees in prestigious companies are required to draft contracts and serve their customers in spite of the fact that it’s outside their working time. In conclusion, the trend to broaden one’s mind and skills by studying and working is one the most crucial criteria to become successful in today’s world, I claim constant effort is the dominance of our society in comparison to the past.

It is argued
 that This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :individualsnationsociety
people
 spend This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:a plethora ofa number ofnumerous
a lot of
 time in their daily basis to entertain and relax in lieu of seeking for opportunities in the future by You use this word too often, consider replacing it withponderconsiderreadexaminelearnthink
studying
 or You use this word too often, consider replacing it withbusyengagedaliverunningemployedfunctioning
working
diligently
. Nevertheless
, I personally
 believe that with the hectic world, few adults and children have a tendency to persist maintaining sedentary lifestyles, instead
, they are inclined
 to strive to expend their time on You use this word too often, consider replacing it withponderconsiderreadexaminelearnthink
studying
 and working.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".First
First of all
, students yearn for being the best version of themselves by absorbing and figure out as much knowledge as possible. In other words
, You use this word too often, consider replacing it withponderconsiderreadexaminelearnthink
studying
 day and night is one of the most popular activities of students in this era. As a result
, the rivalry has risen in the schools and particularly
 amongst learners in classes. Every person This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:oughts to
has to
 try a lot to have flying Possible spelling mistake. 'colours' is British English.colors
colours
 and compliments from teachers or professors. This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:consequently
So
, there are lots of youngsters This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :exploit
use
 more than four hours a day This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:merely
just
 for doing homework and preparing the next
 lessons.

This phenomenon also
 happen in You use this word too often, consider replacing it withbusyengagedaliverunningemployedfunctioning
working
 condition, workers and even their bosses try to work This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :arduous
hard
 more than eight hours a day. Indeed
, the depression to have This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:various
different
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :proficiencies
skills
 to avoid the replacement of artificial intelligence urge everybody irrespective of their careers or generations. For instance
, employees in prestigious This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :enterprisescorporations
companies
are required
 to draft contracts and serve their customers This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:notwithstanding
in spite of
 the fact that it’s outside their You use this word too often, consider replacing it withbusyengagedaliverunningemployedfunctioning
working
 time.

In conclusion
, the trend to broaden one’s mind and This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :proficiencies
skills
 by You use this word too often, consider replacing it withponderconsiderreadexaminelearnthink
studying
 and You use this word too often, consider replacing it withbusyengagedaliverunningemployedfunctioning
working
 is Did you mean "one of"?one of
one
 the most crucial criteria to become successful in This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :this day and agenowadays
today
’s world, I claim constant effort is the dominance of our society in comparison
 to the past. 