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PEOPLE SPEND A LOT ON VARIOUS THINGS AS THEY EARN MORE NOWADAYS THAN BEFORE. IT IS POSITIVE OR NEGATIVE DEVELOPMENT? BRAINSTORM YOUR IDEA.

PEOPLE SPEND A LOT ON VARIOUS THINGS AS THEY EARN MORE NOWADAYS THAN BEFORE. IT IS POSITIVE OR NEGATIVE DEVELOPMENT? BRAINSTORM YOUR IDEA. lXRPD
It is irrefutable that many individuals can afford a variety of goods because they have higher salary than what they used to have. I believe that this could have some positive emotional, social, and economic effect on a society. Looking at the downsides of consumerism, it could damage the environment in different ways. First the more spending on consumer goods, the more waste goes to the landfills, ultimately, resulting in waste pollution. Next, when demand for products increases, factories are required to produce more for which more energy is needed; this process inevitably ends up in air pollution and global warming; the issue which nowadays is the world's main concern. On the other hand, the ability that citizens can buy more will benefit a society. It can improve the economy of a country because taxes that people pay through their purchases will increase the revenue of a government. Moreover, to fulfill the needs of a consumer society, higher rate of production is needed for which more workers have to be hired, dropping the rate of unemployment in that country. In addition, shopping usually has a positive effect on a person's emotion. it is said that like any other rewarding activities, shopping makes our brain release some chemicals which elevate our moods and could result in our happiness. Therefore, not only does more shopping boosts an economy, but also help people feel more better. In conclusion, although too much spending money on shopping goods might harm our environment due to more pollution, it could have some social and economic benefits to a society as well.
It is irrefutable that
many
individuals can afford a variety of
goods
because
they have higher salary than what they
used
to have. I believe that this could have
some
positive
emotional, social, and economic effect on a society.

Looking at the downsides of consumerism, it could damage the environment in
different
ways.
First
the more spending on consumer
goods
, the more waste goes to the landfills,
ultimately
, resulting in waste pollution.
Next
, when demand for products increases, factories
are required
to produce more for which more energy
is needed
; this process
inevitably
ends up in air pollution and global warming; the issue which nowadays is the world's main concern.

On the other hand
, the ability that citizens can
buy
more will benefit a society. It can
improve
the economy of a country
because
taxes that
people
pay through their
purchases
will increase the revenue of a
government
.
Moreover
, to fulfill the needs of a consumer society, higher rate of production
is needed
for which more workers
have to
be hired
, dropping the rate of unemployment in that country.
In addition
,
shopping
usually
has a
positive
effect on a person's emotion.
it
is said
that like any other rewarding activities,
shopping
makes
our brain release
some
chemicals which elevate our moods and could result in our happiness.
Therefore
, not
only
does more
shopping
boosts
an economy,
but
also
help
people
feel
more better
.

In conclusion
, although too much spending money on
shopping
goods
might harm our environment due to more pollution, it could have
some
social and economic benefits to a society
as well
.
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IELTS essay PEOPLE SPEND A LOT ON VARIOUS THINGS AS THEY EARN MORE NOWADAYS THAN BEFORE. IT IS POSITIVE OR NEGATIVE DEVELOPMENT? BRAINSTORM YOUR IDEA.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
264 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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