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People should be friends with animals or they should be regarded only as a source of people’s food and clothes. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

People should be friends with animals or they should be regarded only as a source of people’s food and clothes. 9Lebn
It is frequently argued that the public reckon the animals are people’s confidants or one of the materials of products. Even though there are more benefits of using the animal to make goods, I side with the opinion that people should protect the wildlife from the make some products. One of the many things that the general would say that animal is good source of the merchandise. Also, we cannot discount the fact that the number of commodities is made by the wildlife. For example, the broadcast which was aired by public broadcaster KBS, shows that 73 percent of consumer bought some merchants which are source from animal while there were also stocks made by plants. The example shows that some people do not care about using animals to make products or not. However, we cannot overlook the drawbacks involved that there are significant raw materials to make products without using animals. Therefore, the folks argue that producing some clothes and foods to use the animal have to prevent as soon as possible. There is an article by Taegu local News about the factory make some milk that is made by the bean. The article also deals with the bean milk’s taste and scent that is noting different with original one. In summary, people used to make some products to use animal because there were no replacements. But nowadays, modern society have amount of replace things, I agree with the opinion that animals are our friends.
It is
frequently
argued that the public reckon the
animals
are
people’s
confidants or one of the materials of
products
.
Even though
there are more benefits of using the
animal
to
make
goods
, I side with the opinion that
people
should protect the wildlife from the
make
some
products.

One of the
many
things that the general would say that
animal
is
good
source of the merchandise.
Also
, we cannot discount the fact that the number of commodities
is made
by the wildlife.

For example
, the broadcast which
was aired
by public broadcaster KBS,
shows
that 73 percent of consumer
bought
some
merchants which are source from
animal
while there were
also
stocks made by plants. The example
shows
that
some
people
do not care about using
animals
to
make
products
or not.

However
, we cannot overlook the drawbacks involved that there are significant raw materials to
make
products
without using
animals
.
Therefore
, the folks argue that producing
some
clothes and foods to
use
the
animal
have to
prevent
as
soon
as possible. There is an article by Taegu local News about the factory
make
some
milk that
is made
by the bean. The article
also
deals with the bean milk’s taste and scent
that is
noting
different
with original one.

In summary,
people
used
to
make
some
products
to
use
animal
because
there were no replacements.
But
nowadays, modern society have amount of replace things, I
agree
with the opinion that
animals
are our friends.
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IELTS essay People should be friends with animals or they should be regarded only as a source of people’s food and clothes.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
245 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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