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People need to do multiple jobs. Is computer jobs a positive trend

People need to do multiple jobs. Is computer jobs a positive trend NbwW
Nowadays, people need to do multiple jobs to pay high living and educational costs. Owing to the current financial needs it is the instancy of time, and safe to say that the idea of doing one job is outdated. People prefer to do multiple jobs to increase their income to support themselves and their dependents. It is frequently demanded that students ought to teach new methodologies to learn skills for their future life. Formerly, people use to do a single job, and the salary was enough to support their dependents and lived happily. With the increased expenses, people started to do jobs in shifts, i. e. , part-time and full-time jobs to support their families. Nowadays, students need to work part-time alongside full-time studies. Computers have made our lives easier. For instance, people buy and sell online, which is both money and time-saving. Also, the Marketplace of Facebook, where people buy and sell both used and new items, is the best place to make a profit, as far as my experience is concerned. Moreover, buying from one shopper and selling on another platform is a widely used money-making technique. Therefore, to cover living expenses, people do multiple jobs in shifts. To cope with the problem at hand, it is wise to revise our curriculum with experts through multiple rounds to teach the younger generation to face the challenges of tomorrow. With the advent of technology, people from various backgrounds should be taught how to use a computer with the world wide web. With these skills, students will learn how to deal with people and worse-case scenarios such as fraud in a constructive manner. Another reason why computer skills are useful is they can learn to make an empire of online business and profit by investing online in various countries and currencies. That is an essential skill to learn for their future life. In conclusion, to bear living and educational expenses, people need to do multiple jobs. However, for people from a non-computer background, who rarely know how to use computers, new courses ought to be introduced to educate them about the efficient and effective use.
Nowadays,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
multiple
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
to pay high living and educational costs. Owing to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
financial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needs
it is the
Possible spelling mistake found.
instancy
of time, and safe to say that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
of doing one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
is outdated
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
prefer to do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
multiple
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
to increase their income to support themselves and their dependents. It is
frequently
demanded that students ought to teach new methodologies to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
for their future life.

Formerly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
Make sure that 'use to' is correct. For habitual actions in the past or to mean 'accustomed to', use "used to".
use to
do a single
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
, and the salary was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
to support their dependents and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lived
happily
. With the increased expenses,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
to do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
in shifts,
There should be no space here: "i.e.".
i. e.
Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
,
part-time and full-time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
to support their families. Nowadays, students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to work part-time alongside full-time studies. Computers have made our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
easier.
For instance
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
and sell online, which is both money and time-saving.
Also
, the Marketplace of Facebook, where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
and sell both
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
and new items, is the best place to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a profit, as far as my experience
is concerned
.
Moreover
, buying from one shopper and selling on another platform is a
widely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
money-making technique.
Therefore
, to cover living expenses,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
multiple
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
in shifts.

To cope with the problem at hand, it is wise to revise our curriculum with experts through
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
multiple
rounds to teach the younger generation to face the challenges of tomorrow. With the advent of technology,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from various backgrounds should
be taught
how to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
a computer with the
If the term is a proper noun, use initial capitals.
world wide web
. With these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
, students will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
how to deal with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and worse-case scenarios such as fraud
Consider replacing "in a constructive manner" with the adverb for "constructive"; e.g., "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
in a constructive manner
. Another reason why computer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
are useful is they can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
an empire of online business and profit by investing online in various countries and currencies.
That is
an essential
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skill
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
for their future life.

In conclusion
, to bear living and educational expenses,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
multiple
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
.
However
, for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from a non-computer background, who rarely know how to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
computers, new courses ought to
be introduced
to educate them about the efficient and effective
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
.

IELTS essay People need to do multiple jobs. Is computer jobs a positive trend

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
355 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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