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People attend colleges or universities for many different reasons (for example, new experiences, career preparation, increased knowledge etc. ). Why do you think people attend colleges or universities? You should give reasons for your answer using your ideas and experience. v.12

People attend colleges or universities for many different reasons (for example, new experiences, career preparation, increased knowledge etc. ). Why do you think people attend colleges or universities? You should v. 12
Educational institutes are the primary source of learning, but some people join them for different purposes. Many students join to boost their career or to enhance their social circle to have a valuable place in society. But I joined the university to gain more knowledge and a degree. In this essay, some common reasons are discussed with examples. It is commonly known that many students attend the universities just to have higher degrees because higher degree holders enjoy special treatment in every walk of life. Moreover, they easily get jobs in reputed multinational companies on the basis of their educational certificates. For example, according to a survey conducted by the sociology department of MIT in 2000, in Asian countries, the social status of a doctor or a lawyer is much more than any other professional. That ultimately motivates most of the students to choose these fields. In the same way, Europeans and Americans prefer to become economists or scientists. On the other hand, fellow students come from different parts of the country to attend the university that is why it is the best way for an attendee to increase their social circle. Furthermore, they learn different types of approaches to tackle any educational or non-education problems with each other. For instance, a student learns about different cultures and their customs, in a multi-cultural environment. As a student should have the knowledge of diverse culture as well as professional skills. Professional skills and good social circles are basic pillars of any business. In conclusion, students should not attend the university with a clear motive. They need to choose their profession wisely and then focus on their professional skills rather than getting a higher degree to enjoy the temporary social status.
Educational institutes are the primary source of learning,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
join
them for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
purposes.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
join
to boost their career or to enhance their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
circle to have a valuable place in society.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
joined
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
to gain more knowledge and a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
degree
. In this essay,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
common reasons
are discussed
with examples.

It is
commonly
known that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
attend the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
to have higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
degrees
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
degree
holders enjoy special treatment in every walk of life.
Moreover
, they
easily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
jobs in reputed multinational
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
on the basis of their educational certificates.
For example
, according to a survey conducted by the sociology department of MIT in 2000, in Asian countries, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
status of a doctor or a lawyer is much more than any other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professional
. That
ultimately
motivates most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to choose these fields.
In the same way
, Europeans and Americans prefer to become economists or scientists.

On the other hand
, fellow
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
parts of the country to attend the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
that is
why it is the best way for an attendee to increase their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
circle.
Furthermore
, they learn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
types of approaches to tackle any educational or non-education problems with each other.
For instance
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
learns about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
cultures and their customs, in a multi-cultural environment. As a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
should have the knowledge of diverse culture
as well
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professional
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Professional
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
circles are basic pillars of any business.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
should not attend the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
with a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
motive. They need to choose their profession
wisely
and then focus on their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professional
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
rather
than getting a higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
degree
to enjoy the temporary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
status.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes

IELTS essay People attend colleges or universities for many different reasons (for example, new experiences, career preparation, increased knowledge etc. ). Why do you think people attend colleges or universities? You should v. 12

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
289 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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