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People are surrounded by advertising. Advertising can influence what people think So it has negative effects. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

People are surrounded by advertising. Advertising can influence what people think So it has negative effects. RNE3W
A particular issue about advertisements has raised quite a concern at home and abroad. It has been a wide concern that advertising can cause repercussions on people. In my opinion, saying that advertising only holds disadvantages not only carries an array of weaknesses, there are also positive effects in this respect. On one hand, advertising does possess a myriad of drawbacks to some degree. As the world is permeated with scammers and fraud calls, people are receiving more and more blackmails as well as propaganda. Therefore, individuals are getting easier to step into traps and can not find a way out of the turbulence. However, the aforementioned belief contains weaknesses. Education is nowadays underscoring more on teaching advertising, hence modern people seize infinite knowledge to tell differences from right to wrong, and set up alarms to avoid deceivers. Cyber police systems are also entrenched to capture online criminals, thus people are recently under high securities to stay away from dangers. On the other hand, despite the drawbacks of advertising can run far and wide, there is still a kaleidoscope of merits within online commercials. For one thing, TV programs not only broadcast highly creative commercials but also introduce innovative products to the audiences. The public may receive lots of creative thoughts that they can apply to their daily lives as well as to embed ideas to society. For another, through advertising and social media, it is easier for governments to spread their latest policies and orientations to citizens, which can help people to participate more in public affairs -either with health care, social welfare, or even public constructions. With the help of advertisements, people can be more united and stick together to form social integration. In a nutshell, although negative effects on advertising can cause problems to the public, still positive effects can run far and wide, ranging from helping people to be more creative to congregate the public's recognition.
A particular issue about advertisements has raised quite a concern at home and abroad. It has been a wide concern that advertising can cause repercussions on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. In my opinion, saying that advertising
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
holds disadvantages not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
carries an array of weaknesses, there are
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
effects in this respect.

On one hand, advertising does possess a myriad of drawbacks to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
degree. As the world
is permeated
with scammers and fraud calls,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are receiving more and more blackmails
as well
as propaganda.
Therefore
, individuals are getting easier to step into traps and can not find a way out of the turbulence.
However
, the aforementioned belief contains weaknesses. Education is nowadays underscoring more on teaching advertising,
hence
modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
seize infinite knowledge to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
differences from right to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
, and set up alarms to avoid deceivers. Cyber police systems are
also
entrenched to capture online criminals,
thus
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are recently under high securities to stay away from
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
dangers
.

On the other hand
, despite the drawbacks of advertising can run far and wide, there is
still
a kaleidoscope of merits within online commercials. For one thing, TV programs not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
broadcast
highly
creative commercials
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
introduce innovative products to the audiences. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
may receive lots of creative thoughts that they can apply to their daily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
as well
as to embed
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
to society. For another, through advertising and social media, it is easier for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
to spread their latest policies and orientations to citizens, which can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to participate more in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
affairs -either with health care, social welfare, or even
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
constructions. With the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of advertisements,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can be more united and stick together to form social integration.

In a nutshell, although
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects on advertising can cause problems to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
,
still
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
effects can run far and wide, ranging from helping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to be more creative to congregate the public's recognition.
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IELTS essay People are surrounded by advertising. Advertising can influence what people think So it has negative effects.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
320 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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