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People are complaining of not getting sufficient sleep

People are complaining of not getting sufficient sleep qL2Pw
Not getting sufficient sleep is one of the major complaints by a number of people, nowadays. This essay will discuss the two main problems of stress related illnesses and weight gain that are caused due to lack of sleep. This essay will also suggest solutions to these problems by improving sleeping pattern. One of the main problems is people get stress at workplace is due to lack of sleep. This stress gives rise to major illnesses such as high blood pressure, diabetes, etc. The other major problem is weight gain. People tend to gain weight if their sleeping habits are not normal. It has been proven by a survey in our company that fifty percent of workforce are suffering from high blood pressure and overweight and they normally go to sleep past midnight. As such, various illnesses and obesity are two major problems in today's world that is due to not having enough sleeping time. People should improve their sleeping habit and sleep early. There is a famous old saying “Early to bed, early to rise”, which shall be followed by people, thus providing them enough time to sleep. Often, people go to bed reading on their smartphone, that proves difficult for their brain to slow down and relax. As a result of this, they fall sleep late in the night. In order to improve this, people should refrain using their phone time at least two hours prior to their sleeping time. Sleeping early and not watching screen can help people immensely in getting proper sleeping time. Lack of sleep is one of the main issues in modern fast paced world. This essay discussed two main problems of stress and obesity that are caused due to this issue. This essay also suggested that this issue can be overcome by following two simple solutions of sleeping early and avoiding exposure to screens before sleeping.
Not getting sufficient
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sleep
is one of the
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major
complaints by a number of
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people
, nowadays. This
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essay
will discuss the two
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main
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problems
of
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stress
related illnesses and weight gain that
are caused
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due
to lack of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sleep
. This
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essay
will
also
suggest solutions to these
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problems
by improving
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sleeping
pattern.

One of the
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main
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problems
is
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people
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get
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stress
at workplace is
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due
to lack of
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sleep
. This
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stress
gives rise to
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major
illnesses such as high blood pressure, diabetes, etc. The other
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major
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problem
is weight gain.
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People
tend to gain weight if their
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sleeping
habits are not normal. It has
been proven
by a survey in our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
that fifty percent of workforce are suffering from high blood pressure and
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
overweight and
they
normally
go to
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sleep
past midnight. As such, various illnesses and obesity are two
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major
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problems
in
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today
's world
that is
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due
to not having
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
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sleeping
time.

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People
should
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improve
their
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sleeping
habit and
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sleep
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early
. There is a
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famous
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old
saying
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“Early
to bed,
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early
to rise”, which shall
be followed
by
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people
,
thus
providing them
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
time to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sleep
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Often
,
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people
go to bed reading on their smartphone, that proves difficult for their brain to slow down and relax.
As a result
of this, they fall
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sleep
late in the night. In order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
this,
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people
should refrain using their phone time at least two hours prior to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sleeping
time.
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Sleeping
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early
and not watching screen can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
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people
immensely
in getting proper
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sleeping
time.

Lack of
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sleep
is one of the
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main
issues in modern
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
paced world. This
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essay
discussed two
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main
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
of
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stress
and obesity that
are caused
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due
to this issue. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
essay
also
suggested that this issue can
be overcome
by following two simple solutions of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sleeping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
early
and avoiding exposure to screens
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sleeping
.
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IELTS essay People are complaining of not getting sufficient sleep

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
313 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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