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People aim to achieve the balance between their work and life ,but few people achieve it. what are the causes of this problem. how to overcome it.

People aim to achieve the balance between their work and life, but few people achieve it. what are the causes of this problem. how to overcome it. LJ2n
Of late, the stability connecting with work and life of people has been prevailing concern in significant part of the world. I sea change has been witnessed it is difficult for some people, however other can reach it. The following paragraph would elucidate possible reasons of the problem and purpose a handful of remedial purposes. To commence with the first reason, one of the biggest reason which are stumbling block of people life and work equality. In other world, individual are choosing that job which requires them to spend long hours at the workplace, such jobs will earn them good salary but they will sacrifice their personal life. To tackle this, people need to find some time for themselves and their family it is better for them, they should choose a job with reasonable working hour and salary. To examplify, mass is mostly preferred sitting job in which they just sitting in front of office desk and working whole day due to this, they threat to health and they can reduce their expectancy of good health. Probing further, the another major obstacle of imbalance with work and life is that, time management is also crucial. Every person wastes a lot of time in a day to doing that things which are useless. Moreover, lack of self management is also one of reason why people failure of balancing between life and work. Firstly, people should planning the schedule of their work, then finish it with concentration. For instance, in some countries, it is common for people to turn off their mobile while working hour and when they complete their work, they enjoy their rest time with family. To recapitulate, I think it is necessary for individuals to improve the ability of self management and it is the best way to learn the split work and achieve the aim of balancing between work and lives.
Of late, the stability connecting with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
has been prevailing concern in significant part of the world. I sea
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
has
been witnessed
it is difficult for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
,
however
other can reach it. The following paragraph would elucidate possible
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
of the problem and purpose a handful of remedial purposes. To commence with the
first
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
, one of the biggest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
which are stumbling block of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
equality. In other world, individual are choosing that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
which requires them to spend long hours at the workplace, such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
will earn them
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
salary
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they will sacrifice their personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. To tackle this,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
need to find
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
for themselves and their family it is better for them, they should choose a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
with reasonable working hour and salary. To
Possible spelling mistake found.
examplify
, mass is
mostly
preferred sitting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
in which they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
sitting in front of office desk and working whole day due to this, they threat to
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
health and
they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
their expectancy of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
health. Probing
further
, the another major obstacle of imbalance with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
is that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
management is
also
crucial. Every person wastes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
in a day to doing that things which are useless.
Moreover
, lack of self management is
also
one of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
failure of balancing between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
.
Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should
The verb 'should' requires the base form of the verb: "plan"
planning
the schedule of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
, then finish it with concentration.
For instance
, in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
countries, it is common for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to turn off their mobile while working hour and when they complete their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
, they enjoy their rest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with family. To recapitulate, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
it is necessary for individuals to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the ability of self management and it is the best way to learn the split
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and achieve the aim of balancing between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
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IELTS essay People aim to achieve the balance between their work and life, but few people achieve it. what are the causes of this problem. how to overcome it.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
313 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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