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Parents are encouraged their children to do part-time work in their free time. What are the advantages and disadvantages of doing it?

Parents are encouraged their children to do part-time work in their free time. What are the advantages and disadvantages of doing it? QM3Vy
Nowadays, parents are encouraging their teenagers to do a part time job in their leisure time which make them aware of how to earn money. In this essay, i would like to articulate its pros and cons to youngsters of doing job in spare time. To begin with its merits, the primary advantage which has ushered in development is that children learn to deal with people. To elaborate, youngsters in that age get the proper knowledge to understand the others if they perform any task with another society member. For instance, a survey had been collected in 2017(INDIA) about understanding level of teenagers they come to result that young children who do part time work had better in dealing with life problems easily. Although, they achieve the proper practical knowledge about their future field. Many of the children work as a part time job in that stream they are studying so they get the proper techniques and get connected to the colleagues that can help them in future to get the job after completing studies. However, it also not free for short comings, there are notice worthy disadvantages which can not be regret. The principle drawback is children get distracted from the main aim of their study. To enlarge, children while performing part-time job they likely quit their studies properly and make part-time job as a full-time task which unsatisfied them in the future at the time of promotion because of less qualifications. For example, In ENGLAND, International students generally quit their study courses in mid and work as the part-time worker which feels them failure to achieve satisfactory goals of their life according to BIS Education ministry. To conclude, part-time work has bought several advantages like knowing how to survive with other people and practical details about their study but it may become dangerous because of leaving their academic studies in half.
Nowadays, parents are encouraging their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
to do a part
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
in their leisure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them aware of how to earn money. In this essay,
Did you mean "I"?
i
would like to articulate its pros and cons to youngsters of doing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
in spare time.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with its merits, the primary advantage which has ushered in development is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
learn to deal with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
. To elaborate, youngsters in that age
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the proper knowledge to understand the others if they perform any task with another society member.
For instance
, a survey had
been collected
in 2017(INDIA) about understanding level of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to result that young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
who do part
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
had better in dealing with life problems
easily
.

“Although” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Although
, they achieve the proper practical knowledge about their future field.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
as a part
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
in that stream they are studying
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the proper techniques and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
connected to the colleagues that can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them in future to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
after completing studies.

However
, it
also
not free for
Did you mean "shortcomings"?
short comings
, there are notice worthy disadvantages which can not be regret. The principle drawback is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
distracted from the main aim of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
. To enlarge,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
while performing part-time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
they likely quit their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
properly
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
part-time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
as a full-time task which unsatisfied them in the future at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
of promotion
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
Did you mean "fewer"? The noun qualifications is countable.
less
qualifications.
For example
, In ENGLAND, International students
generally
quit their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
courses in mid and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
as the part-time worker which feels them failure to achieve satisfactory goals of their life according to BIS Education ministry.

To conclude
, part-time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
several advantages like knowing how to survive with other
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
and practical
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
about their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it may become
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of leaving their academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
in half.
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IELTS essay Parents are encouraged their children to do part-time work in their free time. What are the advantages and disadvantages of doing it?

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
313 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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