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owadays, there are less people have time for their hobbies. In this essay, I am going examine some causes and the impacts on the individual and general is the society. On the one hand, there are severals reasons why people spend less time for doing what they like

owadays, there are less people have time for their hobbies. In this essay, I am going examine some causes and the impacts on the individual and general is the society. On the one hand, there are severals reasons why people spend less time for doing what they like nxJao
Nowadays, there are less people have time for their hobbies. In this essay, I am going examine some causes and the impacts on the individual and general is the society. On the one hand, there are severals reasons why people spend less time for doing what they like. Firstly, in the modern area, people are more and more busy than before, especially is young people. As a consequence, people have less time for their hobbies, they always need more time to finish their works. For example, today, more young people stay up late than before, they need more time to finish their deadlines because they do not want to be punished by their boss. In addition, In the past, almost people spend their weekends to do what they want; however, nowadays, some people need to use their weekends to sleep. Sleep might be the way for them to refresh themselves and they spend all the weekend time for sleeping. For instance, in Vietnam, a lot of student study very hard for all the weekdays and they only have weekends to sleep to fill in the night time they spended for learning. On the other hand, spending less time for hobby will have a number of effect to the life of people. First, people who take more time to work, they might have more chances to earn more money than people who spend a lot of time for hobby. An illustration of this is that, a bunch of companies have the policy to reward for their staff who work very hard and finising the deadline early. Nevertheless, when people do not have enough time for their hobbies, they can be put in under stress for all the time, consequently, they will have some mental diseases. For example, more children nowadays are being depression of the exam and exercies at school, meanwhile, some children try to harm themselves because of the stress from school. In conclusion, in the modern area, people have some reasons why they can not spend enough time for their hobbies. While there are some good effects to their life; howerver, some harm impacts on their health is significant.
Nowadays, there are
Did you mean "fewer"? The noun people is countable.
less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hobbies
. In this essay, I am going examine
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
causes and the impacts on the individual and general is the society.

On the one hand, there are
Possible spelling mistake found.
severals
reasons why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
for doing what they like.
Firstly
, in the modern area,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are more and more busy than
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
,
especially
is young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. As a consequence,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hobbies
, they always need more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to finish their works.
For example
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
, more young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
stay up late than
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
, they need more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to finish their deadlines
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they do not want to
be punished
by their boss.
In addition
, In the past, almost
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
weekends
to do what they want;
however
, nowadays,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
need to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
weekends
to sleep. Sleep might be the way for them to refresh
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
themselves and
they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
all the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
weekend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
for sleeping.
For instance
, in Vietnam,
Possible agreement error. The noun student seems to be countable; consider using: "a lot of students".
a lot of student
study
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
for all the
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
weekdays and
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
weekends
to sleep to fill in the night
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
they
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "spent", the past tense form of the verb 'spend'?
spended
for learning.

On the other hand
, spending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hobby
will have a number of effect to the life of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
First
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who take more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to work, they might have more chances to earn more money than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hobby
. An illustration of this is that, a bunch of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
Possible agreement error
have
the policy to reward for their staff who work
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
and
Possible spelling mistake found.
finising
the deadline early.
Nevertheless
, when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hobbies
, they can
be put
in under
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
for all the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
,
consequently
, they will have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
mental diseases.
For example
, more children nowadays are being depression of the exam and
Possible spelling mistake found.
exercies
at school, meanwhile,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
children try to harm themselves
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
from school.

In conclusion
, in the modern area,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
reasons why they can not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hobbies
. While there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
effects to their life;
Possible spelling mistake found.
howerver
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
harm impacts on their health is significant.
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IELTS essay owadays, there are less people have time for their hobbies. In this essay, I am going examine some causes and the impacts on the individual and general is the society. On the one hand, there are severals reasons why people spend less time for doing what they like

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
360 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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