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Our society has been developed, leading to high-tech gadgets become more popular such as computers, mobiles phone

Our society has been developed, leading to high-tech gadgets become more popular such as computers, mobiles phone VygD3
Our society has been developed, leading to high-tech gadgets become more popular such as computers, mobiles phones. However, there are those who opine that young people's reading and writing capacity are affected by these means of communication. In my estimation, I would agree that this has both positive and negative impacts on improving such skills. On the one hand, I agree that over-dependence on modern communication devices, resulting from the poor performance in writing and reading skills of young generation. In the modern-day, people tend to use computer software when composing text documents due to its convenient functions. A clear example, Microsoft Word provides users a chance to modify or erase a piece of text without effort, simultaneously slowing down the writing speed of the users. In addition, a case study published by Unicef has illustrated that more than two-thirds of children and young people have spent almost 4 hours a day on social media, video games, which means they are likely to impair their reading competence in the long term. On the other hand, I would agree that the proper use of computers and mobiles phones would significantly contribute to the improvement of such skills. The first reason is that by using those devices with access to the Internet, users could get an unlimited source of information. This allows them to gain knowledge, and therefore, they are able to enrich their vocabulary, especially for those who learn languages. BBC News, as an example, is useful for English learners. Another reason is that, with the development of social networking sites, people now can easily create blogs and express their thoughts or inner feelings. Today, people who frequently travel often update stories about natural scenery that they visited. By writing regularly, the writing ability of a person is certain to improve. In conclusion, I concur that with the way society is currently progressing, this development of technologies could have both advantages and disadvantages for the reading and writing skills of young people, depending on the way they use.
Our society has
been developed
, leading to high-tech gadgets become more popular such as computers, mobiles phones.
However
, there are those who opine that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
writing
capacity are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
by these means of communication. In my estimation, I would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that this has both
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impacts on improving such
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.

On the one hand, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that over-dependence on modern communication devices, resulting from the poor performance in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
writing
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
generation. In the modern-day,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
tend to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
computer software when composing text documents due to its convenient functions. A
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
example, Microsoft Word provides users a chance to modify or erase a piece of text without effort,
simultaneously
slowing down the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
writing
speed of the users.
In addition
, a case study published by
Possible spelling mistake found.
Unicef
has illustrated that more than two-thirds of children and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have spent almost 4 hours a day on social media, video games, which means they are likely to impair their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
competence in the long term.

On the other hand
, I would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that the proper
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of computers and mobiles phones would
significantly
contribute to the improvement of such
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
. The
first
reason is that by using those devices with access to the Internet, users could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
an unlimited source of information. This
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
them to gain knowledge, and
therefore
, they are able to enrich their vocabulary,
especially
for those who learn languages. BBC News, as an example, is useful for English learners. Another reason is that, with the development of social networking sites,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
can
easily
create blogs and express their thoughts or inner feelings.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Today
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
frequently
travel
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
update stories about natural scenery that they visited. By
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
writing
regularly
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
writing
ability of a person is certain to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
.

In conclusion
, I concur that with the way society is
currently
progressing, this development of technologies could have both advantages and disadvantages for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
writing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, depending on the way they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
.
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IELTS essay Our society has been developed, leading to high-tech gadgets become more popular such as computers, mobiles phone

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
337 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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