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our personalities are predetermined as a result of our birth , do you agree or disagree

our personalities are predetermined as a result of our birth, leyJQ
Some people opine that our genetic history plays a significant role in deciding the characteristics of our behaviour, and there modifying it is beyond our control. However, I strongly believe that even though the genes are an important aspect in shaping part of our personality. I think by self desicipline and guided seminars we are in position to control it. This essay extends these topics further. To begin with, it is a proven fact that personality is developed after the kid starts growing. Infact, it is a byproduct of upbringing, social influences and self descipline of a person. This means person is capable of reshaping his pesonality by taking efforts in the right direction. There are many leaders who have worked very hard to attain the personality they desired. For instance, Steve Jobs, who is one of the biggest business tycoons, faced stage fear when he was in college. But he overcame that limitation with persistant hardwork. Therefore, in my opinion, anyone can craft his personality in desired manner with grit. Another noteworthy point, there are many guided programs which directes people in building their personality the way they desire. Many people are able to change certain undesired aspects of their behaviour by seeking help for such professionals. For instance, there are various seminars to develop communication skills especially targetted for introverts. Another example there are workshops for anger management curated for the people who are short tempered. To conclude, though are behaviour is influenced by our genes I think wih constistent efforts, and professional guidance, we can achieve the desired skills.
Some
people
opine that our genetic history plays a significant role in deciding the characteristics of our
behaviour
, and there modifying it is beyond our control.
However
, I
strongly
believe that
even though
the genes are an
important
aspect in shaping part of our
personality
. I
think
by self
desicipline
and guided seminars we are in position to control it. This essay extends these topics
further
.

To
begin
with, it is a proven fact that
personality
is developed
after the kid
starts
growing.
Infact
, it is a byproduct of upbringing, social influences and self
descipline
of a person. This means person is capable of reshaping his
pesonality
by taking efforts in the right direction. There are
many
leaders who have worked
very
hard
to attain the
personality
they desired.
For instance
, Steve Jobs, who is one of the biggest business tycoons, faced stage fear when he was in college.
But
he overcame that limitation with
persistant
hardwork
.
Therefore
, in my opinion, anyone can craft his
personality
in desired manner with grit.

Another noteworthy point, there are
many
guided programs which
directes
people
in building their
personality
the way they desire.
Many
people
are able to
change
certain undesired aspects of their
behaviour
by seeking
help
for such professionals.
For instance
, there are various seminars to develop communication
skills
especially
targetted
for introverts. Another example there are workshops for anger management curated for the
people
who are short tempered.

To conclude
, though are
behaviour
is influenced
by our genes I
think
wih
constistent
efforts, and professional guidance, we can achieve the desired
skills
.
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IELTS essay our personalities are predetermined as a result of our birth,

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
262 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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