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ou have decided to apply for a job as a Spanish instructor that was advertised in the April edition of the magazine Teaching Professional This ad was posted by Mr John Sullivan director of the Spanish department at The Language Institute of Great Britain v.1

ou have decided to apply for a job as a Spanish instructor that was advertised in the April edition of the magazine Teaching Professional This ad was posted by Mr John Sullivan director of the Spanish department at The Language Institute of Great Britain v. 1
Crime is becoming rampant all over the world. There are several reasons for this, but certain measures could be taken to alleviate this problem. While various factors such as poverty and weak regulation have contributed to the increase of crime, addressing the issues would involve the government to strengthen the law and provide funding to the less fortunate people. The factors, which contribute to the growth of crime rate, are many and varied. One of the significant causes of this problem is related to the poverty. This circumstance has forced the poor to commit certain criminal actions, such as robbery or becoming a drug dealer, in order to obtain some money to continue their lives. In addition, the weak and lenient regulations have exacerbated the situation as many criminals tend to re-offend once they are released from prison. This phenomenon can be seen in some non-developed countries, such as Brazil and Columbia, where most of the offenders will repeat the same criminal action after being released from jail. It is for these reasons, the rate of crime continues to rise. However, some viable solutions are available to tackle this issue. Firstly, the government should play an active role in providing fund to the people with a lower-level income to sustain their living, and in some occassion, they can utilize the money to start a small business, which can be excellent in supporting their daily lives. For instance, Canada is one of the countries with the lowest rate of crime and poverty in 2019 as the poor have been continuously supported by the government. Furthermore, strengthening the law can be an effective way in deterring crimes as people will be scared of the consequences of committing any type of crime. A prime example can be seen in the United State where capital punishment was implemented for drug dealers. In conclusion, although the amount of crime is growing more than ever before, which mostly are caused by the poverty and the weak regulations, some actionable solutions can be implemented. Such remedies would involve the government to provide some fund for the poor, as well as strengthening the law so that the crimes can be reduced.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Crime
is becoming rampant all over the world. There are several reasons for this,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
certain measures could
be taken
to alleviate this problem. While various factors such as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poverty
and weak regulation have contributed to the increase of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
, addressing the issues would involve the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
to strengthen the law and provide funding to the less fortunate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

The factors, which contribute to the growth of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
rate, are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
and varied. One of the significant causes of this problem
is related
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poverty
. This circumstance has forced the poor to commit certain criminal actions, such as robbery or becoming a drug dealer, in order to obtain
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
money to continue their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
In addition
, the weak and lenient regulations have exacerbated the situation as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
criminals tend to re-offend once they
are released
from prison. This phenomenon can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
non-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developed countries
, such as Brazil and Columbia, where most of the offenders will repeat the same criminal action after
being released
from jail. It is for these reasons, the rate of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
continues to rise.

However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
viable solutions are available to tackle this issue.
Firstly
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should play an active role in providing fund to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
with a lower-level income to sustain their living, and in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
Possible spelling mistake found.
occassion
, they can utilize the money to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
business, which can be excellent in supporting their daily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
For instance
, Canada is one of the countries with the lowest rate of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poverty
in 2019 as the poor have been
continuously
supported by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
.
Furthermore
, strengthening the law can be an effective way in deterring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
will
be scared
of the consequences of committing any type of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
. A prime example can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
in the United State where capital punishment
was implemented
for drug dealers.

In conclusion
, although the amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
is growing more than ever
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
, which
mostly
are caused
by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poverty
and the weak regulations,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
actionable solutions can
be implemented
. Such remedies would involve the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
to provide
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
fund for the poor,
as well
as strengthening the law
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay ou have decided to apply for a job as a Spanish instructor that was advertised in the April edition of the magazine Teaching Professional This ad was posted by Mr John Sullivan director of the Spanish department at The Language Institute of Great Britain v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
363 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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