Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Online shopping is increasing dramatically How could this trend affect our environment and the kinds of jobs required v.2

Online shopping is increasing dramatically How could this trend affect our environment and the kinds of jobs required v. 2
Nowadays, technology dominates almost all aspects of human' s life and it is apparent in people' s daily routine. Online shopping is one of the most common achievements that technology brings about for individuals and makes life much easier. Besides, it could affect the environment in terms of diminishing the traffic congestion and providing more job opportunities for people globally. One of the most important problems in mega cities is the traffic congestion which caused many difficulties for the residents of these areas such as air and noise pollution that can cause some diseases like stroke or heart attack. Government authorities could tackle this problem by introducing online shop to the inhabitants of metropolitan cities. People can access the variety of products just by surfing the net, comparing the prices easily and ordering whatever they need from groceries to clothes and stationary equipment. Consequently, they could curb the number of cars in the streets and reduce the pollution. On the other hand, online shop could provide more job opportunities in the society such as web designing, online bank account system, cyber police, post and delivery service and the like. Take an online shop for example that delivers various products to the customers globally. In order to run this work, the managers need a web site to control and check the customers' orders and an advertisement company will have determining effect in introducing the shop all over the world. Moreover, delivery service companies would be involved in handing out the packages. To sum up, online shops not only reduce the environmental problems such as traffic congestion and air pollution but also provide job opportunities for the people. This trend makes life easier and will bring more benefits in the future by enhancing the services they offer to customers.
Nowadays, technology dominates almost all aspects of
Possible spelling mistake found.
human&
#039; s life and it is apparent in
Possible spelling mistake found.
people&
#039; s daily routine.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Online
shopping is one of the most common achievements that technology brings about for individuals and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
life much easier.
Besides
, it could affect the environment in terms of diminishing the traffic congestion and providing more job opportunities for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
globally.

One of the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
problems in mega cities is the traffic congestion which caused
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
difficulties for the residents of these areas such as air and noise pollution that can cause
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
diseases like stroke or heart attack.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Government
authorities could tackle this problem by introducing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shop
to the inhabitants of metropolitan cities.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
can access the variety of products
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
by surfing the net, comparing the prices
easily
and ordering whatever they need from groceries to clothes and stationary equipment.
Consequently
, they could curb the number of cars in the streets and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the pollution.

On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shop
could provide more job opportunities in the society such as web designing,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
bank account system, cyber police, post and delivery service and the like. Take an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shop
for example
that delivers various products to the customers globally. In order to run this work, the managers need a
Did you mean "website"?
web site
to control and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
the
Possible spelling mistake found.
customers&
#039; orders and an advertisement
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
will have determining effect in introducing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shop
all over the world.
Moreover
, delivery service
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
would
be involved
in handing out the packages.

To sum up,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the environmental problems such as traffic congestion and air pollution
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
provide job opportunities for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. This trend
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
life easier and will bring more benefits in the future by enhancing the services they offer to customers.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
15Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS essay Online shopping is increasing dramatically How could this trend affect our environment and the kinds of jobs required v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
297 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts