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One of the most conspicuous trends of today's world is the colossal upsurge in travelling to study is over-rated.

One of the most conspicuous trends of today's world is the colossal upsurge in travelling to study is over-rated. 8xljx
One of the most conspicuous trends of today's world is the colossal upsurge in travelling to study is over-rated. There is a widespread worry that this will only lead to a myriad of concerns in the society. In my opinion, travelling to study has more negative impacts than positives in the society. On the one hand, critics may point out that one of the most significant benefits of travelling to study is the variety of educational institutes with many facilities. For example, students unlike in the past now have more advance education that has many benefits to them. On the other hand, there are a number of arguments in favour of my stance. One of the most preponderant ones is that travelling to study has some negative consequences for the community in various ways. Firstly, sometimes it is very hard for the students to arrange a huge amount of money to study abroad. According to “Times magazine December 2017 edition”, the proportion of people wasting their time and money in travelling to study have increased from 10 per cents to 90 per cents today. Secondly, most students while living abroad miss their families that have negative impacts on their physical and mental health. Lastly, in my opinion, the government of Australia is taking a great initiative in educating its students on the impact of travelling to study. Students are being encouraged to spend a significant portion of their time in travelling according to their need in order to compensate for the problems. In view of the arguments outlined above, one can conclude that despite having some benefits, the drawbacks of travelling to study in the society are indeed too dire to ignore.
One of the most conspicuous trends of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's world is the colossal upsurge in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travelling
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
is over-rated. There is a widespread worry that this will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
lead to a myriad of concerns in the society. In my opinion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travelling
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
has more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impacts than positives in the society.

On the one hand, critics may point out that one of the most significant benefits of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travelling
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
is the variety of educational institutes with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
facilities.
For example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
unlike in the past
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
have more advance education that has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
benefits to them.

On the other hand
, there are a number of arguments in
Possible spelling mistake. 'favour' is British English.
favour
of my stance. One of the most preponderant ones is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travelling
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
consequences for the community in various ways.
Firstly
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to arrange a huge amount of money to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
abroad. According to “Times magazine December 2017 edition”, the proportion of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
wasting their time and money in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travelling
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
have increased from 10 per cents to 90 per cents
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
.
Secondly
, most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
while living abroad miss their families that have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impacts on their physical and mental health.

Lastly
, in my opinion, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
of Australia is taking a great initiative in educating its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
on the impact of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travelling
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Students
are
being encouraged
to spend a significant portion of their time in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travelling
according to their need in order to compensate for the problems.

In view of the arguments outlined above, one can conclude that despite having
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
benefits, the drawbacks of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travelling
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
in the society are
indeed
too dire to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignore
.
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IELTS essay One of the most conspicuous trends of today's world is the colossal upsurge in travelling to study is over-rated.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
282 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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