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On one hand people believed that the most effective method to reduce the rate of crime is to propose longer duration of imprisonment, on the other hand few say that there are other progressive solutions to deal with it.

On one hand people believed that the most effective method to reduce the rate of crime is to propose longer duration of imprisonment, on the other hand few say that there are other progressive solutions to deal with it. Although the idea of prison is to correct one's behaviour in time however the root causes of the crime must also be taken into account. In my opinion, severity of a crime plays a crucial role in deciding one's punishment. Firstly, the idea of imprisoning a criminal is to correct his wrong acts. Generally, the prisoners are kept into a jail, under the surveillance of police officers so to stop the nuisance that the cause in the public. For example, one must undoubtedly be imprisoned for a longer time if he/ she has committed a murder as his / her presence can be fatal to the society. And longer duration assure that these tendencies are under control. Nonetheless, there are other solutions to regulate the law and order in the society. Introspection is the first step to analyse the causes of crimes. In many developing countries it is observed that unemployment is the biggest motivation to crimes which can as simple as theft to as serious as murders. In these cases, the authorities must look after resolving these issues so that the society can function smoothly. I believe that, punishment is indispensable to endorse good conduct and severity of the crime is the biggest factor in deciding it. No matter how long the time is decided for the verdict it is necessary that the guilty has a change of heart in his tenure. This can be achieved by teaching the culprits new skills which can give them jobs after serving their sentence and thus can lead a normal life. In conclusion, punishment is inevitable measure to maintain law and order and severity is ought to be considered. Even so, having a background check on the causes will indubitably reduce its rate
On one hand
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believed that the most effective method to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the rate of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
is to propose longer duration of imprisonment,
on the other hand
few say that there are other progressive solutions to deal with it. Although the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
of prison is to correct one's
Possible spelling mistake. ‘behaviour’ is British English.
behaviour
in time
however
the root
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
causes
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
also
be taken
into account. In my opinion, severity of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
plays a crucial role in deciding one's punishment.

Firstly
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
of imprisoning a criminal is to correct his
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
acts.
Generally
, the prisoners are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
into a jail, under the surveillance of police officers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
the nuisance that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cause
in the public.
For example
, one
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
undoubtedly
be imprisoned
for a longer time if he/ she has committed a murder as his / her presence can be fatal to the society. And longer duration assure that these tendencies are under control.

Nonetheless, there are other solutions to regulate the law and order in the society. Introspection is the
first
step to
Possible spelling mistake. ‘analyse’ is British English.
analyse
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
causes
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
. In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developing countries
it
is observed
that unemployment is the biggest motivation to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
which can as simple as theft to as serious as murders. In these cases, the authorities
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
look after resolving these issues
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that the society can function
smoothly
.

I believe that, punishment is indispensable to endorse
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
conduct and severity of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
is the biggest factor in deciding it. No matter how long the time
is decided
for the verdict it is necessary that the guilty has a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
of heart in his tenure. This can
be achieved
by teaching the culprits new
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
which can give them jobs after serving their sentence and
thus
can lead a normal life.

In conclusion
, punishment is inevitable measure to maintain law and order and severity is ought to
be considered
. Even
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
, having a background
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
causes
will
indubitably
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
its
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph.
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IELTS essay On one hand people believed that the most effective method to reduce the rate of crime is to propose longer duration of imprisonment, on the other hand few say that there are other progressive solutions to deal with it.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
329 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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