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Obesity is increasing what are the causes abd soiltion

Obesity is increasing what are the causes abd soiltion 3LOxm
Undoubtedly, over fat has become most prevalent issue at the contemporary world. The aim of this essay to elucidate not only the pertinent causes behind it, along with remedial measurements in subsequent fragments. The several causes that are responsible for over- weight is, first and foremost, most of the humans are indulged themselves by professional activities then focusing on the diet of child become more henious task. In this situation, parents prefer always thos food that are easy to available. To further explain it, a Harvard health Alumni study (2015) published that when younger intake junk food in their diet, several catastrophic impact can be seen in long term among the health. Consequently, although, packed food are delicious, lead distinct detrimental impacts on health.
Undoubtedly
, over
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fat
has become most prevalent issue at the contemporary world. The aim of this essay to elucidate not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
the pertinent causes behind it, along with remedial measurements in subsequent fragments.

The several causes that are responsible for over- weight is,
first
and foremost, most of the humans
are indulged
themselves by professional activities then focusing on the diet of child become more
Possible spelling mistake found.
henious
task. In this situation, parents
The adverb 'always' is usually put before the verb 'prefer'.
prefer always
Possible spelling mistake found.
thos
food that are easy to available. To
further
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
it, a Harvard health Alumni study (2015) published that when younger intake junk food in their diet, several catastrophic impact can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
in long term among the health.
Consequently
, although, packed food are delicious, lead distinct detrimental impacts on health.
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IELTS essay Obesity is increasing what are the causes abd soiltion

Essay
  American English
2 paragraphs
124 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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