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Nowdays the football supporters bhave violently. What is the causes? How can we slove it?

Football is recognised as global sports, nowdays, and it is true that hooliganism increases among the football supporters. This essay will elucidate the reasons behind brutal behaviour of fans and also suggest some effective solutions. There are two obvious causes for vandalism of football supporters. The first one is emotional relationship. The fans tie emotionally with their supportive teams so the winning supporters provoke the defeated one and violent situations arise. Apart from this, years old rivalry is also root cause behind this problem. For instance Barcelona versus Real Madrid football matches have been evident of hooliganism due to their rivalry. Secondly, a lot of people are adicted to wager. W hile their players or team not perform well, they lost their temper as well as money and start act violently. By tacking appropriate steps we can combat the problem. At first, government should enact the laws againist wager. As consequence, the supporters take less intrest in it. Secondly, the sittinfs must be seggregated for diffenent team followers so that they do not have physical violence. At last, football teams should give traing to their supporters about calm behaviour and also encourage that not to bother their loosing team followers. For example, if Ronaldo, from Juventas, urges fans to make peace they surelt obey his request. To recapitulate briefly betting and the emotional is at root of the aggressive behaviour of football fans. However, by enacting the strict laws againist betting and educating fabs about behaviour, we can overcome this problem
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Football
is recognised
as global sports, nowdays, and it is true that hooliganism increases among the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
football
supporters. This essay will elucidate the reasons behind brutal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
behaviour
of fans and
also
suggest
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
effective solutions.

There are two obvious causes for vandalism of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
football
supporters. The
first
one is emotional relationship. The fans tie
emotionally
with their supportive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teams
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
the winning supporters provoke the defeated one and violent situations arise.

Apart from this, years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
rivalry is
also
root cause behind this problem.
For instance
Barcelona versus Real Madrid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
football
matches have been evident of hooliganism due to their rivalry.
Secondly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are adicted
to wager. W hile their players or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
team
not perform well, they lost their temper
as well
as money and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
act
violently
.

By tacking appropriate steps we can combat the problem. At
first
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should enact the laws againist wager. As consequence, the supporters take less intrest in it.
Secondly
, the sittinfs
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be seggregated
for diffenent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
team
followers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they do not have physical violence. At last,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
football
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teams
should give traing to their supporters about calm
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
behaviour
and
also
encourage that not to bother their loosing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
team
followers.
For example
, if Ronaldo, from Juventas, urges fans to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
peace they surelt obey his request.

To recapitulate
briefly
betting and the emotional is at root of the aggressive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
behaviour
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
football
fans.
However
, by enacting the strict laws againist betting and educating fabs about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
behaviour
, we can overcome this problem
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IELTS essay Nowdays the football supporters bhave violently. What is the causes? How can we slove it?

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
250 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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