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Nowadays youngster are more likely to prefer shopping is it a positive development or negative development

Nowadays youngster are more likely to prefer shopping is it a positive development or negative development wogY
In modern era number of people spend more time on shopping which takes the place of other activities that people used to do in leisure time. This is a negative development because it is considering as wastage of time and money. This essay intends to discuss the viewpoint of this development. The first and foremost reason of why the trend has a negative development is that preference given to shopping leads to brain stress. In other words, people who spend their more time in purchasing activity face various brain related disease such as, headache, lack concentration and tiredness. If people impose themselves in other activities and pursue their hobbies they can feel Moreover, people become lethargic because many people find this exercise boring but they have to do that sometime because of family pressure or for their partner's interest. So, excess of such type of practices can affect their mental and physical health. Furthermore, considering the fact of financial benefits shopping is not in the favour of expenses saving. Take for example, people spend too much on purchasing the product or material either it is valuable for them or not. They follow consumerism and waste their money on excess goods. However, sometime it is necessary to buy the things and needed material, but most of the time it consider as wastage of money. Apart from that, majority of individuals spend their leisure time on buying which is not a good thing. They should utilise their free time in other interesting and beneficial activities rather than shopping. For instance, it can be observed that women spend a big portion of their life on shopping and suffer with mental trauma as compared to men. So, they should engage themselves other activities for remaining fit and fine. To conclude, although to some extent it is necessary to purchase things because they are basic need of everyone's life, excess of everything have greater impact of individuals life. Hence, people should maintain their routine not imposing themselves in one thing.
In modern era number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
which takes the place of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to do in leisure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
. This is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
development
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is considering as wastage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and money. This essay intends to discuss the viewpoint of this development. The
first
and foremost reason of why the trend has a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
development is that preference
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
leads to brain
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
words,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
their more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
in purchasing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activity
face various brain related disease such as, headache, lack concentration and tiredness. If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
impose themselves in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
and pursue their hobbies they can feel
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
become lethargic
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
find this exercise boring
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
do that sometime
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of family pressure or for their partner's interest.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, excess of such type of practices can affect their mental and physical health.
Furthermore
, considering the fact of financial benefits
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
is not in the
Possible spelling mistake. 'favour' is British English.
favour
of expenses saving. Take
for example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
too much on purchasing the product or material either it is valuable for them or not. They follow consumerism and waste their money on excess
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
.
However
, sometime it is necessary to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
the things and needed material,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
it
Did you mean "considers"?
consider
as wastage of money. Apart from that, majority of individuals
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
their leisure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on buying which is not a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
thing. They should
Possible spelling mistake. 'utilise' is British English.
utilise
their free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
interesting and beneficial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
rather
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
.
For instance
, it can
be observed
that women
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
portion of their life on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
and suffer with mental trauma as compared to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, they should engage themselves
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
for remaining fit and fine.
To conclude
, although to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
extent it is necessary to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
things
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they are basic need of everyone's life, excess of everything have greater impact of individuals life.
Hence
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should maintain their routine not imposing themselves in one thing.
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IELTS essay Nowadays youngster are more likely to prefer shopping is it a positive development or negative development

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
335 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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