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Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology. v.46

Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology. v. 46
Technological developments in this modern era have transformed the way we socialise. Advancements in communication networks have played a vital role in bringing people closer. In my opinion, there are both pros and cons of this development and this essay will analyse how technology has changed the types of relationships made by people. In ancient times, people used letters and telegrams to interact with each other. With the advent of modern communication systems like the telephone and the Internet, people can collaborate more effectively. For instance, we can interact through emails rather than letter and businessman can have online meetings through the conference calls. Another reason is the widespread use of social networks over the internet; for instance, Facebook, where men and women can now make friends online and interact with them through the post, message and online chat. Video conferencing in the form of Skype has improved instructor and student relationship. Online messaging platforms like mIRC has given people the luxury to choose their own discussion-based chat rooms. There are more ways to socialise now than they used to be in past. All these advancements in technology come up with their merits and demerits. Letters, memos and telegrams are replaced by emails and text messages. Human resource hiring can be done through online video conferencing which has eliminated the need for physical presence and travelling requirement. We can now mingle more through Facebook, Pinterest, Google+, Instagram and Orkut and so on. Though one can regard these as positive developments, they do have some negative aspects. These developments have isolated people and discouraged real-world interaction. For instance, youth, in particular, prefers to choose to mix up with people online rather than socialising with them in the real world. To conclude, technology has no doubt revolutionised the way we interact and hang out but has greatly reduced real-world interaction. Though these virtual relations tend to be positive, we should not deny the importance of physical interaction in our lives.
Technological
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developments
in this modern era have transformed the way we
Possible spelling mistake. 'socialise' is British English.
socialise
. Advancements in communication networks have played a vital role in bringing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
closer. In my opinion, there are both pros and cons of this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
and this essay will
Possible spelling mistake. 'analyse' is British English.
analyse
how technology has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
the types of relationships made by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

In ancient times,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
letters and telegrams to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interact
with each other. With the advent of modern communication systems like the telephone and the Internet,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can collaborate more
effectively
.
For instance
, we can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interact
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
through
emails
rather
than letter and businessman can have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
meetings
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
through
the conference calls.

Another reason is the widespread
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of social networks over the internet;
for instance
, Facebook, where
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
and women can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
friends
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interact
with them
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
through
the post, message and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
chat. Video conferencing in the form of Skype has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
instructor and student relationship.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Online
messaging platforms like
Possible spelling mistake found.
mIRC
has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
the luxury to choose their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
discussion-based chat rooms. There are more ways to
Possible spelling mistake. 'socialise' is British English.
socialise
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
than they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to be
Did you mean: "in the past"?
in past
.

All these advancements in technology
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
up with their merits and demerits. Letters, memos and telegrams
are replaced
by emails and text messages. Human resource hiring can
be done
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
through
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
video conferencing which has eliminated the need for physical presence and travelling requirement. We can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
mingle more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
through
Facebook, Pinterest, Google+, Instagram and
Possible spelling mistake found.
Orkut
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on. Though one can regard these as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developments
, they do have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
aspects. These
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developments
have isolated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and discouraged real-world interaction.
For instance
, youth,
in particular
, prefers to choose to mix up with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
rather
than
Possible spelling mistake. 'socialising' is British English.
socialising
with them in the real world.

To conclude
, technology has no doubt
Possible spelling mistake. 'revolutionised' is British English.
revolutionised
the way we
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interact
and hang out
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
has
greatly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
real-world interaction. Though these virtual relations tend to be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
, we should not deny the importance of physical interaction in our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
25Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology. v. 46

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
328 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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