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Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology. v.45

Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology. v. 45
From the last century to these present days, there have been many changes in the way people interact with each other as there have been evolutionary changes in technological fields. One may say this transformation has negative effects on relationships between people or positive effects. I believe that there have been more positive effects than negative ones among the people due to the reasons that in few seconds of time people can contact their dearest ones and technology gives strength to people by making them closer to each other even if they are not. From the introduction of telecommunication and electronic mail, the lives of people turned out to be easier and communication among people became easier and more convenient. They can contact their families and friends using these advanced services over the countries. Without visiting their homes frequently, they can make money or accomplish their goals. For example, a military man has to serve his country at the borders and it is uneasy to go home and spend some time with his family and acquaintances thoroughly. However, he can make contact his family via telephone and other services. With the help of telecommunication and electronic mails, he can keep in touch with his family and buddies. In this way, technology makes people close to each other. This absolutely positive development as we have huge benefits using technology. With the absence of one's dearest one, he used to be all alone before the introduction of technology. But, it is possible to get in touch with his sweetheart. And also, he can send and receive the money within seconds over the thousands of miles using the latest money transfer machines. As a result, he can look over and take care of his family's financial problems and needs without his presence at his home. For instance, my uncle who stays in the United States calls his family and others via ‘Skype’ daily whereas, my dad who used to work in Dubai could not keep in touch with us as at that time the telecommunication had not installed in my village. Thus, that made my father bound to visit us frequently. Consequently, he spent a large amount of money travelling and could not communicate us as frequently as he wanted to. In many positive ways, the technology has affected the relationships between people and I would say these are positive developments. Imagine without technology, what would happen to the people and the world. In many ways, we are getting the help of using technology.
From the last century to these present days, there have been
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
way
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
interact with each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
as there have been evolutionary
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in technological fields. One may say this transformation has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects on relationships between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
positive
effects. I believe that there have been more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
positive
effects than
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ones
among the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
due to the reasons that in few seconds of time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can contact their dearest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ones
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
gives strength to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
by making them closer to each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
even if they are not.

From the introduction of telecommunication and electronic mail, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
turned out to be easier and communication among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
became easier and more convenient. They can contact their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
and friends using these advanced services over the countries. Without visiting their homes
frequently
, they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
or accomplish their goals.
For example
, a military
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
serve his country at the borders and it is uneasy to go home and spend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
time with his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
and acquaintances
thoroughly
.
However
, he can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
contact his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
via telephone and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
services. With the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of telecommunication and electronic mails, he can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
in touch with his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
and buddies. In this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
way
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
close to each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
. This
absolutely
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
positive
development as we have huge benefits using technology.

With the absence of one's dearest one, he
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to be all alone
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
the introduction of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
, it is possible to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
in touch with his sweetheart. And
also
, he can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
and receive the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
within seconds over the thousands of miles using the latest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
transfer machines.
As a result
, he can look over and take care of his family's financial problems and needs without his presence at his home.
For instance
, my uncle who stays in the United States calls his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
and others
via ‘Skype’ daily whereas, my dad who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to work in Dubai could not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
in touch with us as at that time the telecommunication had not installed in my village.
Thus
, that made my father bound to visit us
frequently
.
Consequently
, he spent a large amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
travelling and could not communicate us as
frequently
as he wanted to.

In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
positive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ways
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
the relationships between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and I would say these are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
positive
developments. Imagine without
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
, what would happen to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and the world. In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ways
, we are getting the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
40Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes

IELTS essay Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology. v. 45

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
421 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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