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Nowadays technology is increasingly being used to monitor what people are saying and doing (for example, through tracking and security cameras. In many cases, the people being monitored are unaware that this is happening.

Nowadays technology is increasingly being used to monitor what people are saying and doing (for example, through tracking and security cameras. In many cases, the people being monitored are unaware that this is happening. jm7p
In this tome technology is highly being used to see what other individuals action example of these are, GPS and CCTV cameras. In this case, they are being watch and unknowingly of this situation which I think is advantageous but do at least say that they are being watch. Firstly, I believe that being in a video without permission is something you should be mad about. However, I think there is a lot of incidents that was recorded because of surveillance camera. This shows how helpful it is nowadays that there are a lot of burgling are happening. Secondly, this might help the police find something important for example rape, pick pockets, and find the culprit. Addition to that is that you will feel safe because you know you are being watch by a camera and your worry will be lessen that you will be attack because they will be scared that their face will show up. Moreover, a lot of of establishments, houses, and private properties shows a sign that they are have a security camera or they are being monitored. This is a good technique because the culprit will be afraid to do their plan. While GPS are being accessible when it to tracking a person and even a gadget an example of this is when you lost your phone you can easily find where is it and know if the person who got it or see who the person using the mobile. In conclusion, being watch maybe a disadvantage but advantages outweigh this because it is very helpful. There are a lot of individuals use sign to address that they are being watch so you will know that you are being recorded.
In this tome technology is
highly
being
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
what other individuals action example of these are, GPS and CCTV
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cameras
.
In this case
, they are being
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
watch
and
unknowingly
of this situation which I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
is advantageous
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
do at least say that they are being
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
.

Firstly
, I believe that being in a video without permission is something you should be mad about.
However
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
there is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of incidents that
was recorded
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of surveillance
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
camera
. This
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
how helpful it is nowadays that there are a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of burgling are happening.

Secondly
, this might
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
the police find something
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for example
rape, pick pockets, and find the culprit. Addition to
that is
that you will feel safe
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
you know you are being
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
watch
by a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
camera
and your worry will be
Consider using the past participle "lessened"?
lessen
that you will be attack
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they will
be scared
that their face will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
up.

Moreover
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
Possible typo: you repeated a word
of of
establishments,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
, and private properties
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sign
that they are
Consider using a past participle here: "had".
have
a security
Use a comma before 'or' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
camera or
they are
being monitored
. This is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
technique
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the culprit will be afraid to do their plan. While GPS are being accessible when it to tracking a person and even a gadget an example of this is when you lost your phone you can
easily
find where is it and know if the person who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
it or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
who the person using the mobile.

In conclusion
, being
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
watch
maybe a disadvantage
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
advantages outweigh this
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
helpful. There are a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of individuals
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sign
to address that they are being
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
watch
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
you will know that you are
being recorded
.
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IELTS essay Nowadays technology is increasingly being used to monitor what people are saying and doing (for example, through tracking and security cameras. In many cases, the people being monitored are unaware that this is happening.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
285 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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