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Nowadays, some professional such as doctors lawyers and engineers are paid much higher than ordinary workers what do you think of this Trend? What kind of workers do you think deserve higher wages?

Nowadays, some professional such as doctors lawyers and engineers are paid much higher than ordinary workers what do you think of this Trend? What kind of workers do you think deserve higher wages? 0BBp1
Money plays a very crucial role in the lives of ordinary as well as professional people. Some skillful workers like doctors lawyers and engineers have paid much higher wages as compared to the average employees. This essay will discuss that to why the white collars desire much salary and it will also discuss that what kind of other workers would also be required lofty salary in the subsequent paragraphs. To begin with, there are several reasons for this trend. First and foremost, the medical practitioners, advocates and engineers plays an enormous role in our society. Doctors are the embodiment of courage and dedication they burn their midnight oil to save the lives of the community. For instance, they work around the clock in the situation of pandemic of covid-19 coronavirus. The thousands of inventions that have changed the world only because of the engineers. Moreover, in this contemporary era, where the crimes are frequently increasing at the mammoth rate the lawyers put their best efforts to make the society free from offenders. Secondly, there are also other kind of workers such as soldiers, cops, scientist, and teachers which should be paid higher. Owing to the fact that teachers are the torch bearers they play a pivotal role in building a successful career of an individual. Besides this, the scientists are also very important for our society as they invent new medicines, vaccines and secure the lives of millions of people. The soldiers and Cops should also be paid lofty because they protect the country from the invaders. In addition to this, they also work in extreme weather conditions such as deserts, mountains exactra. To conclude, as a professional such as surgeons, engineers and lawyers are hardworking members of our community so they are paid higher. Admittedly, the Cops, soldiers, scientist and teachers should be paid higher as they also play a crucial role in our society.
Money
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plays
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
crucial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
role
in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
of ordinary
as well
as professional
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
skillful workers like doctors lawyers and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
engineers
have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
paid
much higher wages as compared to the average employees. This essay will discuss that to why the white collars desire much salary and it will
also
discuss that what kind of other workers would
also
be required
lofty salary in the subsequent paragraphs. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, there are several reasons for this trend.
First
and foremost, the medical practitioners, advocates and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
engineers
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plays
an enormous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
role
in our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
. Doctors are the embodiment of courage and dedication they burn their midnight oil to save the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
of the community.
For instance
, they work around the clock in the situation of pandemic of
Did you mean "COVID-19" or the alternative spelling "Covid-19" (= coronavirus)?
covid-19
coronavirus. The thousands of inventions that have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
the world
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
engineers
.
Moreover
, in this contemporary era, where the crimes are
frequently
increasing at the mammoth rate the lawyers put their best efforts to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
free from offenders.
Secondly
, there are
also
other
Possible agreement error. Did you mean "kinds"?
kind
of workers such as soldiers, cops, scientist, and teachers which should be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
paid
higher. Owing to the fact that teachers are the
This expression is normally spelled as one or with hyphen.
torch bearers
they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
a pivotal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
role
in building a successful career of an individual.
Besides
this, the scientists are
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
as they invent new medicines, vaccines and secure the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
of millions of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
. The soldiers and Cops should
also
be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
paid
lofty
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they protect the country from the invaders.
In addition
to this, they
also
work in extreme weather conditions such as deserts, mountains
Possible spelling mistake found.
exactra
.
To conclude
, as a professional such as surgeons,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
engineers
and lawyers are hardworking members of our community
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
paid
higher.
Admittedly
, the Cops, soldiers, scientist and teachers should be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
paid
higher
Comparison requires "than", not 'then' nor 'as'.
as
they
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
a crucial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
role
in our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
.
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IELTS essay Nowadays, some professional such as doctors lawyers and engineers are paid much higher than ordinary workers what do you think of this Trend? What kind of workers do you think deserve higher wages?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
316 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
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