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Nowadays, some parents put a lot of pressure on their children. Why parents the reason for doing that? Is this a positive or negative development for the children?

Nowadays, some parents put a lot of pressure on their children. Why parents the reason for doing that? Is this a positive or negative development for the children? rGgj2
The topic surrounded with the education is always at a heat. In this ever-changing world, too much is expected from children than past generations. Obviously, many parents are responsible for the heavy pressure their children are under. This essay will discuss not only the main causes of the older generation putting pressure on the young, but some negative effects of this issue. There are two main reasons behind this phenomenon. Firstly, with the development of the education level, the circumstance of children begin to become more fierce. Both of the parents and teachers of children require them to put more effort into academic study from an early age, which means that children must concentrate on studying rather than other entertainments. Even some research shows that the entertainment time on electronic device spent of these children dropped a lot in China in last 3 years. They have to finish their homework arranged by school and even go to the training classes on weekends. The level of their ability to sustain those pressure is still pretty low among these children. Secondly, too many expectations have been placed on their children by some parents. They hope they can get a high mark in one vital exam and get a good ranking. In long respective, parents of these children hope they have a good future. And the consequence of this is that they arrange the things what their children they need to do and urge them to fight into this direction. The pressure begins to accumulate in this process. As far as I am concerned, I deem it is not a good development for children to sustain such pressure in an early age. To begin with, the stage of the childhood should be enjoyable and pleasant in one person’s growth process. It is not advantageous for children to develop their personality, mental ability and many aspects. Even it will cause the short sighted problems and obesity. Furthermore, over scheduled children often feel exhausted when having to attend extra classes after a tiring day at school, therefore, they are more likely to be overwhelmed by the physiological and psychological stress. From what has been mentioned above, we can come to the conclusion that children are under too much parental pressure for several reasons, and it is evident that stress from parents has a variety of drawbacks. This problem should be taken seriously by both parents and children to prevent it from deteriorating further.
The topic surrounded with the education is always at a heat. In this ever-changing world, too much is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expected
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
than past generations.
Obviously
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
are responsible for the heavy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pressure
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
are under. This essay will discuss not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
the main causes of the older generation putting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pressure
on the young,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects of this issue.

There are two main reasons behind this phenomenon.
Firstly
, with the development of the education level, the circumstance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
to become more fierce. Both of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
and teachers of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
require them to put more effort into academic study from an early age, which means that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
concentrate on studying
rather
than other entertainments. Even
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
research
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that the entertainment time on electronic device spent of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
dropped a lot in China in last 3 years. They
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
finish their homework arranged by school and even go to the training classes on weekends. The level of their ability to sustain those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pressure
is
still
pretty low among these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
Secondly
, too
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
expectations have
been placed
on their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
. They hope they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a high mark in one vital exam and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
ranking. In long respective,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
hope they have a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
future. And the consequence of this is that they arrange the things what their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
they need to do and urge them to fight into this direction. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pressure
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begins
to accumulate in this process.

As far as I
am concerned
, I deem it is not a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
development for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to sustain such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pressure
in an early age. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, the stage of the childhood should be enjoyable and pleasant in one person’s growth process. It is not advantageous for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to develop their personality, mental ability and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
aspects. Even it will cause the
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
short sighted
problems and obesity.
Furthermore
, over scheduled
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
feel exhausted when having to attend extra classes after a tiring day at school,
therefore
, they are more likely to
be overwhelmed
by the physiological and psychological
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
.

From what has
been mentioned
above, we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to the conclusion that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
are under too much parental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pressure
for several reasons, and it is evident that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
has a variety of drawbacks. This problem should
be taken
seriously
by both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
it from deteriorating
further
.
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IELTS essay Nowadays, some parents put a lot of pressure on their children. Why parents the reason for doing that? Is this a positive or negative development for the children?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
408 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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