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Nowadays people are less fit and healthy than they were in the past, which could affect their long term health. Why do you think this is? What can be done to solve this problem?

Inactive and unhealthy lifestyles have been a growing concern over the last decade. As a result, longevity rate is absolute low at this point. This essay will discuss the causes of people being unhealthy and weaker including their sedentary lifestyles and availability of convenience food. This essay will also suggest two solutions to this problem including less use of technology as well as consumption of less storage food. Firstly, the main reason for weakness and un-healthiness is an inactive lifestyle. In comparison to past, from work to our everyday life, technology has taken over to a great extent. As a result, we hardly move our muscles in our everyday life and hence become less fit and unhealthy. Video games, for example, has affected lives of children to such extent that there are concerns regarding the impairment of their reflexes due to the repetitive nature of hand muscles when playing video games. Secondly, people nowadays consume a lot of convenience food in order to save time for other chores. These foods are usually being stored for a long time hence these are not healthy by any means. For instance, a research from Harvard University suggests that eighty percent of convenience food consumers suffer from indigestion problem. Therefore, storage food and sedentary lifestyles impair our health to a great extent. On the other hand, limited usage of technology and availability of fresh food could solve this problem. If we can restrict ourselves from staring at the laptop monitor or phone display for a long time, problems such as eye strain or bad reflexes will reduce rapidly. A research from Deloitte, for example, suggests that office workers suffer from eye strain double as much as field workers. Secondly, government, as an advocate of social awareness should encourage preparing fresh food instead of consuming storage food. For example, they can impose a ban on unhealthy convenience food or restrict the amount of frozen food a customer can buy from the market. Thus, people can be benefited extensively if they restrict themselves from using too much technology and eat fresh food every day. In conclusion, unhealthy lifestyle has become a growing predicament in the recent past. This essay discussed how availability of convenience food and sedentary lifestyle can damage our health and how they can keep us away from being fit. This essay also suggested solutions including regular preparation of fresh food and less usage of tech devices.
Inactive and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
unhealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lifestyles
have been a growing concern over the last decade.
As a result
, longevity rate is absolute low at this point. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
essay
will discuss the causes of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
being
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
unhealthy
and weaker including their sedentary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lifestyles
and availability of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
convenience
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
essay
will
also
suggest two solutions to this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
including
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
less
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
as well
as consumption of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
less
storage food.

Firstly
, the main reason for weakness and
Possible spelling mistake found.
un-healthiness
is an inactive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lifestyle
.
In comparison
to past, from work to our everyday life,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
has taken over to a great extent.
As a result
, we hardly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
our muscles in our everyday life and
hence
become
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
less
fit and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
unhealthy
. Video games,
for example
, has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
of children to such extent that there are concerns regarding the impairment of their reflexes due to the repetitive nature of hand muscles when playing video games.
Secondly
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
nowadays consume
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
convenience
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
in order to save time for other chores. These
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
are
usually
being stored
for a long time
hence
these are not healthy by any means.
For instance
,
Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply “research”.
a research
from Harvard University suggests that eighty percent of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
convenience
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
consumers suffer from indigestion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
.
Therefore
, storage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
and sedentary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lifestyles
impair our health to a great extent.

On the other hand
, limited usage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
and availability of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fresh
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
could solve this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
. If we can restrict ourselves from staring at the laptop monitor or phone display for a long time,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
such as eye strain or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
reflexes will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
rapidly
.
Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply “research”.
A research
from Deloitte,
for example
, suggests that office workers suffer from eye strain double as much as field workers.
Secondly
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
, as an advocate of social awareness should encourage preparing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fresh
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
instead
of consuming storage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
.
For example
, they can impose a ban on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
unhealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
convenience
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
or restrict the amount of frozen
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
a customer can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
from the market.
Thus
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can
be benefited
extensively
if they restrict themselves from using too much
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
and eat
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fresh
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
every day.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
unhealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lifestyle
has become a growing predicament in the recent past. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
essay
discussed how availability of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
convenience
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
and sedentary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lifestyle
can damage our health and how they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
us away from
being fit
. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
essay
also
suggested solutions including regular preparation of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fresh
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
less
usage of tech devices.
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IELTS essay Nowadays people are less fit and healthy than they were in the past, which could affect their long term health. Why do you think this is? What can be done to solve this problem?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
403 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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