Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Nowadays, people are becoming famous at young age . It is a positive and negative development?

Nowadays, people are becoming famous at young age. It is a positive and negative development? kxwPn
Every individual is seen striving hard to achieve succes in their life. Admittedly. with the advancement of technology, people become prominent figures at the initial phase of their carrers. This Essay is an attempt to enumerate it has both favorable and unfavorable outcome associated with this trend which will be enunciated in the subsequent paragraphs prior to a meaningful conclusion. As far as the, the positive impacts of being popular are concerned, the predominant one is the young celebrities can become self- reliant as to lessen the financial burden imposed on their families along with, earn fat salary cheques which is not only fulfill their desires and cater the longing aspirations for the family members. Moreover, eran massive amount of incomes and greatly contribute in the economic progression of the country by healthy taxpayers. Also, the young renowned personalities can fetch global recognition to bring more name and fame for themselves and their nations apart from this they can become an inspiration especially for the young minds in order to be constructive and productive in their lives. On the other hand, this trend create various demerits which can never be overlooked. Primarily, under the influence of Easy money that may fall prey of illicit activities so as to have adverse impact on future. On top of it, they cannot enjoy there lives to the utmost owing to being in the media highlights that can cause anxiety and depression breathing to the suicide. Besides this, young celebrities attend wide range of parties they are consuming intoxicants which can have lethal effect on the environment and on their personal and professional lives ensuring to, they take erroneous decisions in their life. In conclusion, I would reckon that people should adopt sagacious approach towards people become famous at the young age they acquire name and fame along with earn hefty amoun. However, this trend create a negative impact which cannot be ignored.
Every individual is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
striving
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to achieve
Possible spelling mistake found.
succes
in their life.
Admittedly
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
with
the advancement of technology,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
prominent figures at the initial phase of their
Possible spelling mistake found.
carrers
. This Essay is an attempt to enumerate it has both favorable and unfavorable outcome associated with this trend which will
be enunciated
in the subsequent paragraphs prior to a meaningful conclusion. As far as
Did you forget something after 'the'?
the,
the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
impacts of being popular
are concerned
, the predominant one is the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
celebrities can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
self- reliant as to lessen the financial burden imposed on their families along with, earn
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fat
salary
Possible spelling mistake. 'cheques' is British English.
cheques
which is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
fulfill their desires and cater the longing aspirations for the family members.
Moreover
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
eran
massive amount of incomes and
greatly
contribute in the economic progression of the country by healthy taxpayers.
Also
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
renowned personalities can fetch global recognition to bring more name and fame for themselves and their nations apart from this they can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
an inspiration
especially
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
minds in order to be constructive and productive in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.

On the other hand
,
The verb 'create' is plural. Did you mean: "this trend creates"? Did you use a verb instead of a noun?
this trend create
various demerits which can never
be overlooked
.
Primarily
, under the influence of Easy money that may fall prey of illicit activities
'So as to' expresses purpose and is used in formal texts. Consider using "to"
so as to
have adverse impact on future. On top of it, they cannot enjoy there
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
to the utmost owing to being in the media highlights that can cause anxiety and depression breathing to the suicide.
Besides
this,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
celebrities attend wide range of parties they are consuming intoxicants which can have lethal effect on the environment and on their personal and professional
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
ensuring to, they take erroneous decisions in their life.

In conclusion
, I would reckon that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
should adopt sagacious approach towards
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
age they acquire name and fame along with earn hefty
Possible spelling mistake found.
amoun
.
However
,
The verb 'create' is plural. Did you mean: "this trend creates"? Did you use a verb instead of a noun?
this trend create
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impact which cannot be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignored
.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay Nowadays, people are becoming famous at young age. It is a positive and negative development?

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
319 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts