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Nowadays more and more people consume fast food on a regular basis. What can be the advantages and disadvantages of this trend? v.2

Nowadays more and more people consume fast food on a regular basis. What can be the advantages and disadvantages of this trend? v. 2
In this day and age, many people claim that consuming fast food on a regular basis has gained popularity. While some people accept that there are some benefits, others think that it has several drawbacks. On the one hand, there are some disadvantages of consuming fast food. The main shortcoming is that fast food contains the high content of salt, fat, and carbohydrate. It is important that people use regularly junk food makes them suffer from health problems. The most example of this are overweight, diabetes, high blood pressure, and heart-related diseases. Another drawback is that using junk food and sugary snack increase the risk of cancer in citizens, such as liver and stomach cancers. This stem from food additives, which is supplemented in processed food. Moreover, poor food hygiene is a factor contributing to increase the cancer people rate in the world. On the other hand, it seems to some people that citizens consume junk food because of some undeniable benefits. Firstly, it is important that consuming fast food makes it easier for people to prepare a meal. This is necessary for people who fail to cook. As a result, they can save time and devote more time and energy to effectively work. Another advantage could be that is an apparent fact that fast food is cheap and mouth-watering. For instance, there is the majority of 85 % Vietnamese who are surveyed think that processed food is attractive. In conclusion, there are some plus points for consuming fast food, although this decision has some notable downsides.
In this day and age,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
claim that consuming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
on a regular basis has gained popularity. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
accept that there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
benefits, others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it has several drawbacks.

On the one hand, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
disadvantages of consuming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
. The main shortcoming is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
contains the high content of salt,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fat
, and carbohydrate. It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
regularly
junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
them suffer from health problems. The most example of this are overweight, diabetes, high blood pressure, and heart-related diseases. Another drawback is that using junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
and sugary snack increase the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
of cancer in citizens, such as liver and stomach cancers. This stem from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
additives, which
is supplemented
in processed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
.
Moreover
, poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
hygiene is a factor contributing to increase the cancer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
rate in the world.

On the other hand
, it seems to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
that citizens consume junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
undeniable benefits.
Firstly
, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
that consuming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
it easier for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to prepare a meal. This is necessary for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who fail to cook.
As a result
, they can save time and devote more time and energy to
effectively
work. Another advantage could be
that is
an apparent fact that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cheap
and mouth-watering.
For instance
, there is the majority of 85 % Vietnamese who
are surveyed
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that processed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
is attractive.

In conclusion
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
plus points for consuming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
, although this decision has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
notable downsides.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Nowadays more and more people consume fast food on a regular basis. What can be the advantages and disadvantages of this trend? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
257 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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