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Nowadays many people have access to computers on a wide basis and a large number of children play computer games. What are the negative impacts of children playing computer games and what can be done to minimize the bad effects?

Computers in today's world are widely accessible to a lot of people and a huge number of children are using them for playing computer games. This essay will discuss the harmful effects of children playing computer games and suggest possible solutions to minimize them. Children nowadays are playing virtual games more than before which is affecting their mental health drastically. Most of the computer games have a lot of violence in them and it has detrimental effect on the brain of a child. For example, recent studies have shown that violence in video games can cause violent behaviour in a child. Moreover, spending more time on these games can make children really dull as they are immersed in to a virtual world and forget reality. All these can really bad for child’s mental state. There are few solutions for these problems like limiting the number of hours spend on the computer and participating in physical activities. When children limit their time on computers they get more time to spend on leisure activities. Physical exercises are the best way to fill those free times. Participating in sports make them physically as well as mentally tough. For instance, doctors always recommend daily 30 minutes of exercise can reduce mental stress. All these things can really help in mental health issues in children. To conclude, computer games can affect children’s mental health in a bad way but this can be reduced by spending less hours on computer and participating more in outdoor physical activities.
Computers in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's world are
widely
accessible to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
and a huge number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
are using them for playing computer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
. This essay will discuss the harmful effects of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
playing computer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
and suggest possible solutions to minimize them.

Children nowadays are playing virtual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
more than
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
which is affecting their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mental
health
drastically
. Most of the computer
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games
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
violence in them and it has detrimental effect on the brain of a child.
For example
, recent studies have shown that violence in video
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
can cause violent
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
in a child.
Moreover
, spending more
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time
on these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
really
dull as they
are immersed
in to a virtual world and forget reality. All
Did you mean "this can" or "these cans"?
these can
really
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
for child’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mental
state.

There are few solutions for these problems like limiting the number of hours spend on the computer and participating in physical activities.
“When” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
When
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children
limit their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on computers they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to spend on leisure activities. Physical exercises are the best way to fill those free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
times
. Participating in sports
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them
physically
as well
as mentally tough.
For instance
, doctors always recommend daily 30 minutes of exercise can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mental
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
. All these things can
really
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mental
health issues in children.

To conclude
, computer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
can affect
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mental
health in a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
way
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
this can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
by spending
Did you mean "fewer hours"?
less hours
on computer and participating more in outdoor physical activities.
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IELTS essay Nowadays many people have access to computers on a wide basis and a large number of children play computer games. What are the negative impacts of children playing computer games and what can be done to minimize the bad effects?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
251 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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