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Nowadays, many people drive to work or school instead of walking, cycling or using public transport. Does this trend have more advantages or more disadvantages?

Nowadays, many people drive to work or school instead of walking, cycling or using public transport. Does this trend have more advantages or more disadvantages? pp6y
Some individuals prefer to go to school or work driving instead of opting to use other modes of transportation such as walking or cycling. In my opinion, the disadvantages of this development like the pollution it causes and the high cost outweigh the benefit of getting somewhere faster. The main drawback of using cars to go to work or school is that it greatly harms the environment. When people use their cars or motorcycles to get from one point to another they are burning fossil fuel which results in sometimes irreparable damages to the air everybody breaths and also the ozone layer contributing to global warming. Another disadvantage is the higher cost of this kind of transportation mode. Individuals have to spend a great amount of money to buy a car and the maintenance can also be quite expensive. Besides that, there are costs with taxes and insurance that should be taken into consideration. To illustrate, in Brazil people take huge loans in order to afford to buy and keep a car, which they could avoid if they choose another mean of transportation such as cycling which has close to zero costs. However, the advantage of getting where people need faster can be tempting. When one uses a car to move around they do not need to worry about leaving a long time in advance such as they would if they had to take a bus, for example. Consequently, people have more free time to enjoy or spend on their work or studies which can make a big difference in their lives. In conclusion, I reaffirm my opinion that the drawbacks of driving to work or school such as harming the environment and having immense expenses are greater than the merit of getting to places faster.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
individuals prefer to go to school or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
driving
instead
of opting to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
other modes of transportation such as walking or cycling. In my opinion, the disadvantages of this development like the pollution it causes and the high cost outweigh the benefit of getting somewhere faster.

The main drawback of using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
to go to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
or school is that it
greatly
harms the environment. When
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
or motorcycles to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
from one point to another they are burning fossil fuel which results in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
irreparable damages to the air everybody breaths and
also
the ozone layer contributing to global warming.

Another disadvantage is the higher cost of this kind of transportation mode. Individuals
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
spend a great amount of money to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
and the maintenance can
also
be quite expensive.
Besides
that, there are costs with taxes and insurance that should
be taken
into consideration. To illustrate, in Brazil
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
take huge loans in order to afford to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
, which they could avoid if they choose another mean of transportation such as cycling which has close to zero costs.

However
, the advantage of getting where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
need faster can be tempting. When one
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
uses
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
around they do not need to worry about leaving a long time in advance such as they would if they had to take a bus,
for example
.
Consequently
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have more free time to enjoy or spend on their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
or studies which can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
difference in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.

In conclusion
, I reaffirm my opinion that the drawbacks of driving to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
or school such as harming the environment and having immense expenses are greater than the merit of getting to places faster.

IELTS essay Nowadays, many people drive to work or school instead of walking, cycling or using public transport. Does this trend have more advantages or more disadvantages?

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
296 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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