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Nowadays, It becomes a trend to take one year break before start university education. Many people believe that these type of work and travel experience needed before the university studies, some of them disagree, they think this is wast of time. I completely agree with the statement and I am going to share my view in this essay.

Nowadays, It becomes a trend to take one year break before start university education. Many people believe that these type of work and travel experience needed before the university studies, some of them disagree, they think this is wast of time. I completely agree with the statement and I am going to share my view in this essay. 0Bw5l
Nowadays, It become a trend to take a one-year break before starting university education. Although many people believe that this type of work and travel experience is needed before university studies, some of them disagree and believe this is a waste of time. I completely agree with the statement, and I will share my view in this essay. The first and foremost advantage of taking a break is that students can learn essential industrial Experience before starting their university studies. For Example, if they are going to learn programming languages, It is necessary to understand why to know them and their usefulness in work. In addition, By doing this, most importantly, they can understand current market trends and what kind of job responsibility they should fulfill, learn how to work and deal with skilled employees. However, there is a chance that, If they take more than one year break, they would lose their expertise in study or their control over some of the subjects, which they haven't used or learned while working with highly reputed companies. The most significant advantage of travelling to overseas countries is that they can learn different cultures, languages, and work people do for their survival. As a result, their view becomes more comprehensive to understand the real issues; they can also think out of the box. For instance, Many Entrepreneur, including Steve Jobs, believes that people should travel as much as possible. So, in the end, they could come up with many different ideas that can help solve many problems for people. Additionally, they can build a business on it. Moreover, these things allow them to understand the passion or skill on which they are already skilled. Finally, maybe students can figure out what subject or area of expertise they should focus on in years to come. To conclude, It is probably true that taking a break between school and university studies benefits more for their future. This time spent on work experience gives students a chance to build self-confidence, maturity and decision-making skills before enrolling in university studies.
Nowadays, It
Did you mean "becomes"?
become
a trend to take a one-year
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
break
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
before
starting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
education. Although
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that this type of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and travel experience
is needed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
before
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
of them disagree and believe this is a waste of time. I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the statement, and I will share my view in this essay.

The
first
and foremost advantage of taking a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
break
is that students can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
essential industrial Experience
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
before
starting their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
.
For Example
, if they are going to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
programming languages, It is necessary to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
understand
why to know them and their usefulness in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
.
In addition
, By doing this, most
importantly
, they can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
understand
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
market trends and what kind of job responsibility they should fulfill,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
how to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and deal with skilled employees.
However
, there is a chance that, If they take more than one year
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
break
, they would lose their expertise in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
or their control over
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
subjects, which they haven't
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
or learned while working with
highly
reputed
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
.

The most significant advantage of travelling to overseas countries is that they can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
cultures, languages, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do for their survival.
As a result
, their view becomes more comprehensive to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
understand
the real issues; they can
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
out of the box.
For instance
,
Possible agreement error. The noun Entrepreneur seems to be countable; consider using: "Many entrepreneurs".
Many Entrepreneur
, including Steve Jobs, believes that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should travel as much as possible.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
, they could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
up with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
that can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
solve
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
problems for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
Additionally
, they can build a business on it.
Moreover
, these things
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
them to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
understand
the passion or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
on which they are already skilled.
Finally
, maybe students can figure out what subject or area of expertise they should focus on in years to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
.

To conclude
, It is
probably
true that taking a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
break
between school and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
benefits more for their future. This time spent on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
experience gives students a chance to build self-confidence, maturity and decision-making
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
before
enrolling in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
.
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IELTS essay Nowadays, It becomes a trend to take one year break before start university education. Many people believe that these type of work and travel experience needed before the university studies, some of them disagree, they think this is wast of time. I completely agree with the statement and I am going to share my view in this essay.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
344 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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  • Nowadays, It becomes a trend to take one year break before start university education. Many people believe that these type of work and travel experience needed before the university studies, some of them disagree, they think this is wast of time. I completely agree with the statement and I am going to share my view in this essay.