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Nowadays, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young people compared to older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Nowadays, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young people compared to older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages? 1mkeX
It is an undeniable fact that the population of the world has been increasing at a drastic rate. But in certain countries, this population growth has been erratic, which resulted in majority of population being young. Although young people can contribute more towards the economy but if they are not given proper guidance, it can hurt the country’s image instead. Having a major portion of country’s population in their 20s and 30s can help the nation grow economically. Young people are lot more energetic and can get the tasks done in less time as compared to older people. Therefore, the country will be able to produce much more exportable products in short time, thereby bringing increased foreign revenue. For instance, China’s GDP is third highest in the world and 68% of its population is in their 20s. Conversely, if the country doesn’t grow economically, then it can compromise the standard of livings of its citizen. This is a direct indicator that youngsters play a fundamental role in driving any country’s economy. However, one major drawback of having higher percentage of young people is the lack of skilled labor. If more than 50% of the population is young and inexperienced then this will lead to a shortage of training instructors. For instance, if a country starts producing export items which are flimsy and unreliable, then it can damage the country’s image in the global community. Young people may be able to provide short term benefits in the form of quantity of products but if the quality is not up to the mark, then it can deteriorate the economy in the long run. Therefore, any country should have an optimum proportion of young and old generation so they could complement each other. In conclusion, this scenario offers more drawbacks than benefits. Although on surface it may seem like that a country can benefit more by having higher proportion of young people as it won’t have to import skilled labor but there should also be resources to accommodate these young people accordingly, particularly employment.
It is an undeniable fact that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
of the world has been increasing at a drastic rate.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
in certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
, this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
growth has been erratic, which resulted in
It seems that an article is missing.
majority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
being
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
. Although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can contribute more towards the economy
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
if they are not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
proper guidance, it can hurt the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country’s
image
instead
.

Having a major portion of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
in their 20s and 30s can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
the nation grow
economically
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are lot more energetic and can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the tasks done in less time as compared to older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
Therefore
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
will be able to produce much more exportable products in short time, thereby bringing increased foreign revenue.
For instance
, China’s GDP is third highest in the world and 68% of its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
is in their 20s.
Conversely
, if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
doesn’t grow
economically
, then it can compromise the standard of livings of its citizen. This is a direct indicator that youngsters play a fundamental role in driving any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country’s
economy.

However
, one major drawback of having higher percentage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
is the lack of skilled labor. If more than 50% of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
and inexperienced then this will lead to a shortage of training instructors.
For instance
, if a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
starts
producing export items which are flimsy and unreliable, then it can damage the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country’s
image in the global community.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
may be able to provide short term benefits in the form of quantity of products
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
if the quality is not up to the mark, then it can deteriorate the economy in the long run.
Therefore
, any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
should have an optimum proportion of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
generation
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they could complement each other.

In conclusion
, this scenario offers more drawbacks than benefits. Although on surface it may seem like that a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
can benefit more by having higher proportion of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
as it won’t
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
import skilled labor
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
there should
also
be resources to accommodate these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
accordingly
,
particularly
employment.
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IELTS essay Nowadays, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young people compared to older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
341 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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