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Nowadays, development of technology has a big impact in each aspect of human life, one of that is agriculture.

Nowadays, development of technology has a big impact in each aspect of human life, one of that is agriculture. 53elm
Nowadays, development of technology has a big impact in each aspect of human life, one of that is agriculture. It is provided by modern machines, big land, and so on. However, there are some people in various place still have less food. I believe it happens because in some country they do not have a land to plant and also job. Government should make innovations to help people. First of all, in several country in the world they do not have a land with better quality as a consequence people can not plant in their area. People can not produce their own food because the area where they live is not provided anything that they want. For example, people who live in desert area they can not plant vegetables or fruit because of the weather. In addition, some place still hungry because the large number of unemployment and it can be difficult for people to getting food without money. On the other hand, Government can make new innovations in technology, and gives job to people. make water irrigation for people who live in rural area to provide their basic needs. In addition government also can make new places for people to work like farm area as result people can have their personal income to buy necessary items for their life. In conclusion, development of technology is really helpful for human life However, it still hard for other people to get food. It would be good if government provide new innovations to help people and their income.
Nowadays, development of technology has a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
impact in each aspect of human life, one of
that is
agriculture. It
is provided
by modern machines,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
land, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on.
However
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in various place
still
have less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
. I believe it happens
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
country they do not have a land to plant and
also
job.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Government
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
innovations to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, in several country in the world they do not have a land with better quality as a consequence
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can not plant in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
can not produce their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
where they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
is not provided anything that they want.
For example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in desert
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
they can not plant vegetables or fruit
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the weather.
In addition
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
Did you mean "places"?
place
still
hungry
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the large number of unemployment and it can be difficult for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to getting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
without money.

On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Government
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
new innovations in technology, and gives job to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
make
water irrigation for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
to provide their basic needs. In
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
addition
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
also
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
new places for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to work like farm
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
as result
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can have their personal income to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
necessary items for their life.

In conclusion
, development of technology is
really
helpful for human life
However
,
It seems that a verb is missing.
it
still
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
for other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
. It would be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
provide new innovations to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and their income.
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Language is wine upon the lips. – Virginia WoolfInspirational quotes for language learners
Virginia Woolf

IELTS essay Nowadays, development of technology has a big impact in each aspect of human life, one of that is agriculture.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
256 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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