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Nowadays consumerism is very high among people of all nations. They are influenced by the latest machines and different fashions. For this reason, people are getting into throwaway habits, While this dominance can be proven beneficial in some ways , i believe it to have more damaging effects.which i will elaborate in upcoming paragraphs.

Nowadays consumerism is very high among people of all nations. They are influenced by the latest machines and different fashions. For this reason, people are getting into throwaway habits, While this dominance can be proven beneficial in some ways, i believe it to have more damaging effects. which i will elaborate in upcoming paragraphs. l7geb
The leading disadvantage of throwing away to old things for placing them with new one's is that it makes masses more spender even then, they have no need to buy any product they attract towards appealing packaging even if, these products remain untouched afterwards. Also, When any kind of fashion or new electric gadget comes in market people usually disposed them off. Sometimes they just drained to the wastage into rivers where animals or birds drink water and this bad habit become a cause of death of innocent animals. It doesn't only badly affects to animals and birds but also brings a lot of problems to the environment because packaging is often done by plastic bags which are non -biodegradable thus, it is reason of soil pollution as well Moreover, over purchasing also become a cause of stress among parents especially among the youngsters when their friends buy new fashionable product they pester their parents to get them those latest gadgets sometimes parents can't afford and they denied them which increases the possibilities of children indulging in bad habits even crimes: chain snatching, theft at home and many other things. Despite this, there is a positive aspect as well like when anything comes new in the markets people buy them and easily familiar with new advanced technology as well as consumerism also help populace to adapt latest fashion not of own country but fashion of all other nations as well. In conclusion, although there are some good affects of buying new things and getting red of old products, it seems to me that consumerism creates a plethora of problems for people which can have a lasting bad influence on everyone.
The leading disadvantage of throwing away to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
things for placing them with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
one's is that it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
masses more spender even
Did you mean "than"?
then
, they have no need to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
they attract towards appealing packaging even if, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
remain untouched afterwards.
Also
, When any kind of fashion or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
electric gadget
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
in market
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
usually
disposed them off.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Sometimes
they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
drained to the wastage into rivers where animals or birds drink water and this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
habit become a cause of death of innocent animals. It doesn't
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
badly
affects to animals and birds
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
brings
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
problems to the environment
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
packaging is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
done by plastic bags which are non -biodegradable
thus
, it is reason of soil pollution as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
Moreover
, over purchasing
also
become a cause of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
among parents
especially
among the youngsters when their friends
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
fashionable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
they pester their parents to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
them those latest gadgets
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
parents can't
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
afford and
they denied them which increases the possibilities of children indulging in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
habits even crimes: chain snatching, theft at home and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
other things. Despite this, there is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
aspect as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
Comparison is written 'as well "as"'.
like
when anything
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
in the markets
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
them and
easily
familiar with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
advanced technology as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
as consumerism
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
populace to adapt
A determiner is probably missing here: "the latest".
latest
fashion not of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
country
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
fashion of all other nations as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
.
In conclusion
, although there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
affects of buying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
things and getting red of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
, it seems to me that consumerism creates a plethora of problems for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
which can have a lasting
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
influence on everyone.
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IELTS essay Nowadays consumerism is very high among people of all nations. They are influenced by the latest machines and different fashions. For this reason, people are getting into throwaway habits, While this dominance can be proven beneficial in some ways, i believe it to have more damaging effects. which i will elaborate in upcoming paragraphs.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
280 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
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Lexical Resource: 5.5
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Grammatical Range: 6.0
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    Present relevant ideas
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  • Nowadays consumerism is very high among people of all nations. They are influenced by the latest machines and different fashions. For this reason, people are getting into throwaway habits, While this dominance can be proven beneficial in some ways , i believe it to have more damaging effects.which i will elaborate in upcoming paragraphs.