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Nowadays, a group of people have been thinking that giving children

Nowadays, a group of people have been thinking that giving children 9wrnr
Nowadays, a group of people have been thinking that giving children the freedom of choice regarding daily matters like what they prefer to eat, wear, or even having fun, can contribute to negative results such as leading those kids to be selfish in the future, in contrast, other folks have believed that giving children the chance to make their own decisions about personal issues is an essential and helpful action. To my mind, kids have to develop their characters and learn to be independent and parents have to understand that and support their sons. In the forthcoming paragraphs, I shall explain my point of view. On the one hand, having control over young boys by leading, educating, and enhancing their awareness level is a vital role that all parents have to carry. This is mainly because, this era has a plethora of distractors as well as many external efforts by friends and various society members, which may lead to bad consequences such as having grown persons with bad habits and attitudes who do not understand the meaning of love and the importance of helping others. In addition, according to some crowds, if any little kid was given the ability to decide when he was young, it will become a habit and value for him, which is hard to change later. On the other hand, some small issues can be handled by most kids, and even if they are afraid to try or do not have enough confidence to take a step, their fathers have to simplify it by encouraging and teaching them to apply it. The primary reason behind that is, those small sons need to break many fears and learn how to step out of their comfort zone, based on that this support provided by fathers can be very effective and it will certainly help children face any upcoming challenges by themselves, which will make them stronger and increase their chance to have a brighter future. In conclusion, although a number of people have been thinking that parents have always to be responsible for everything regarding their kids live, and they should never allow them to choose anything, I strongly believe that parents should give their sons a degree of freedom because it will definitely help them maintain and improve their personalities and without the need to worry about any unwanted results.
Nowadays, a group of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
have been thinking that giving children the freedom of choice regarding daily matters like what they prefer to eat, wear, or even having fun, can contribute to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
results such as leading those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
to be selfish in the future,
in contrast
, other folks have believed that giving children the chance to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
decisions about personal issues is an essential and helpful action. To my mind,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
develop their characters and learn to be independent and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
understand that and support their sons. In the forthcoming paragraphs, I shall
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
my point of view.

On the one hand, having control over young boys by leading, educating, and enhancing their awareness level is a vital role that all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
carry. This is
mainly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
, this era has a plethora of
Possible spelling mistake found.
distractors
as well
as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
external efforts by friends and various society members, which may lead to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
consequences such as having grown persons with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
habits and attitudes who do not understand the meaning of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
and the importance of helping others.
In addition
, according to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
crowds, if any
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kid
was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
the ability to decide when he was young, it will become a habit and value for him, which is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
later.

On the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
issues can
be handled
by most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
, and even if they are afraid to try or do not have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
confidence to take a step, their fathers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
simplify it by encouraging and teaching them to apply it. The primary reason behind
that is
, those
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
sons need to break
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
fears and learn how to step out of their comfort zone, based on that this support provided by fathers can be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
effective and it will
certainly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
children face any upcoming challenges by themselves, which will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them stronger and increase their chance to have a brighter future.

In conclusion
, although a number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
have been thinking that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
have always to be responsible for everything regarding their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
, and they should never
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
them to choose anything, I
strongly
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
should give their sons a degree of freedom
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it will definitely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them maintain and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their personalities and without the need to worry about any unwanted results.
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IELTS essay Nowadays, a group of people have been thinking that giving children

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
393 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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