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Now, write an essay to an educated reader to discuss your opinions about challenges of being famous. Include reasons and any relevant examples to support your answer. You should write at least 250 words.

Now, write an essay to an educated reader to discuss your opinions about challenges of being famous. Include reasons and any relevant examples to support your answer. XlP8N
Nowadays, it has been widely believed that thunderbolts guarantee a comfortable life without worrying about money or anything else. If so, why are so many articles on celebrity suicide due to stress in life? Is it true that thunder is so easy? . Therefore, this article will discuss the challenges of becoming a celebrity. We could not dispute the fact that celebrities can earn a ton of money through their activities such as: business, advertising and so оп. Namely, They spend their lives in luxurious houses, in expensive cars, traveling the world… They always wear famous branded clothing or jewelry. Granted, celebrities have a simpler life than most other people. Nonetheless, detection is the cause of many problems. First of all, celebrities do not have real privacy. Every time they went out they would be caught on the cover of a newspaper which could damage their image immediately. Take Miss Vietnam - Ky Duyen to find for example. A photo of her lying on a plane with an unusual shape was posted on the Internet. As a result, many criticized her for not knowing what to do in public; or that he did not keep the image of Miss Vietnam. The truth was that she was very tired when she was promoted as Miss Vietnamese, so she tried to take a break from the plane. How poor she was! And, the problems come not only from the paparazzi but also from the fan. They follow celebrities everywhere, asking for a picture or an autograph… This is somehow really annoying and tired for famous people. Second, fame also brings a major problem that celebrities should be concerned about for their own safety and that of their families. For serious example, possessions in a personal house of a famous singer in Vietnam were stolen in last month. She was very worried and it took a long time for him to recover after that. This is reason why some celebrities should equip a modern system or safety to protect their reality life and their family. Futhermore, some adherents are so immoral that they even threaten their idol if he does not accept the offer of his heir. In short, being celebrity can be good but not an easy way of life. If you are interested in being known by everyone, you should accept its negative aspects and find a way to deal with it.
Nowadays, it has been
widely
believed that thunderbolts guarantee a comfortable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
without worrying about money or anything else. If
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
, why are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
articles on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrity
suicide due to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
? Is it true that thunder is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
easy?
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Therefore
, this article will discuss the challenges of becoming a celebrity.

We could not dispute the fact that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrities
can earn a ton of money through their activities such as: business, advertising and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
Possible spelling mistake found.
оп
.
Namely
, They spend their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
in luxurious
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
, in expensive cars, traveling the world… They always wear
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
branded clothing or jewelry. Granted,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrities
have a simpler
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
than most other
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

Nonetheless, detection is the cause of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
problems.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrities
do not have real privacy. Every time they went out they would
be caught
on the cover of a newspaper which could damage their image immediately. Take Miss Vietnam
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
-
Ky
Possible spelling mistake found.
Duyen
to find

for example
. A photo of her lying on a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plane
with an unusual shape
was posted
on the Internet.
As a result
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
criticized her for not knowing what to do in public; or that he did not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
the image of Miss Vietnam. The truth was that she was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
tired when she
was promoted
as Miss Vietnamese,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
she tried to take a break from the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plane
. How poor she was! And, the problems
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
from the paparazzi
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
from the fan. They follow
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrities
everywhere, asking for a picture or an autograph… This is somehow
really
annoying and tired for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

Second, fame
also
brings a major problem that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrities
should
be concerned
about for their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
safety and that of their families. For serious example, possessions in a personal
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
of a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
singer in Vietnam
were stolen
in last month. She was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
worried and it took a long time for him to recover after that. This is reason why
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrities
should equip a modern system or safety to protect their reality
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and their family.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Futhermore
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
adherents are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
immoral that they even threaten their idol if he does not accept the offer of his heir.

In short, being
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrity
can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not an easy way of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. If you
are interested
in
being known
by everyone, you should accept its
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
aspects and find a way to deal with it.
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IELTS essay Now, write an essay to an educated reader to discuss your opinions about challenges of being famous. Include reasons and any relevant examples to support your answer.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
401 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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