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Novels, magazines and poetry are considered the three major forms of literature. Which one do you prefer? Explain why. v.1

Novels, magazines and poetry are considered the three major forms of literature. Which one do you prefer? Explain why. v. 1
In the modern era, people are living a lifestyle that has minimal activity. However, a significant increase can be seen in health clubs or gyms. Consequently, people face various physical and mental health issues due to lack of activity. The following paragraphs will draw upon the problems and also discuss the potential solutions. Firstly, one of the consequences people face due to sedentary lifestyle is because of a busy schedule, so they became more prone to obesity and other health-related issues. These include high blood pressure and stroke. Consuming pre-processed or cooked food adds on to this and they consequently have health issues at a young age. Secondly, as a result of a lazy lifestyle, the risk of developing mental health issues is high as Most individuals spend a considerable amount of time on technology at work or home. For instance, they are using computers or machines for household tasks. This further takes away the opportunity to interact or connect with others. Consequently, people today develop depression and anxiety issues, that might cross-impact in maintaining this unhealthy lifestyle. Moreover, this is becoming such a big challenge for health and well being and can be managed by adopting small changes in day to day life. Looking at the solution, it is important to plan activities that allow enough movement while working in offices or at home. For example, planning a walk around the block during breaks can help a person to have a change of scenery and allow some fresh air and sun. In addition to this, replacing pre-packed lunches with healthy fruits and salads can not only support healthy eating but also help to stay active. Another useful habit has time off without any technology to encourage people to connect with others. Planning a day with intentional reminders for moving or intermittent exercise can help as well. To conclude, an inactive way of living is the main reason that people have more health issues at a very young age. This can be modified by creating minor changes in daily life that may benefit from restoring health and well being.
In the modern era,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are living a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lifestyle
that has minimal activity.
However
, a significant increase can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
clubs or gyms.
Consequently
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
face various physical and mental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issues
due to lack of activity. The following paragraphs will draw upon the problems and
also
discuss the potential solutions.

Firstly
, one of the consequences
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
face due to sedentary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lifestyle
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of a busy schedule,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they became more prone to obesity and other health-related
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issues
. These include high blood pressure and stroke. Consuming
Possible spelling mistake found.
pre-processed
or cooked food
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
adds
on to
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
this and
they
consequently
have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issues
at a young age.
Secondly
,
as a result
of a lazy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lifestyle
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
of developing mental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issues
is high as Most individuals spend a considerable amount of time on technology at work or home.
For instance
, they are using computers or machines for household tasks. This
further
takes away the opportunity to interact or connect with others.
Consequently
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
develop depression and anxiety
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issues
, that might cross-impact in maintaining this unhealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lifestyle
.
Moreover
, this is becoming such a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
challenge for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
and
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
well being
and can
be managed
by adopting
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in day to day life.

Looking at the solution, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to plan activities that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
movement while working in offices or at home.
For example
, planning a walk around the block during breaks can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
a person to have a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
of scenery and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
fresh air and sun.
In addition
to this, replacing
Possible spelling mistake found.
pre-packed
lunches with healthy fruits and salads can not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
support healthy eating
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to stay active. Another useful habit has time off without any technology to encourage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to connect with others. Planning a day with intentional reminders for moving or intermittent exercise can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
as well
.

To conclude
, an inactive way of living is the main reason that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issues
at a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
young age. This can
be modified
by creating minor
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in daily life that may benefit from restoring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
and
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
well being
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
Learning another language is not only learning different words for the same things, but learning another way to think about things.
Flora Lewis

IELTS essay Novels, magazines and poetry are considered the three major forms of literature. Which one do you prefer? Explain why. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
349 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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