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nkasnclksc;lsamfc;m ;pnmd

nkasnclksc;lsamfc;m ;pnmd 6660j
It is a common belief that art and music are not necessary to be compulsory in the school program. However, I absolutely believe that these fields should be noticed at school and become an important part of the development of children. To begin with, the music and art lessons help student more comfortable and united. After studying the stressful natural science classes such as Math, Chemistry and Biology that require thinking continuously, 45 minutes to learn to draw or sing is a time for children to relax and communicate with each other. By way of example, they can share about the favorite songs and art knowledge. As a result, it is an excellent method for parents and teachers to understand more about their children, and the students also feel closer to adults. In conclusion, art and music classes completely play a significant role in the education of children. On top of that, art and music not only lead children to develop the abstract thinking but also help them gain more knowledge about various cultures around the world. Firstly, these lesson are useful for the growth of the imagination and Emotional Quotient of teenagers. This also has a positive impact on students in other subjects in the scheme. Moreover, through the history of works of art, students can know about the unique cultures. To sum up, art and music have numerous benefits on the growth of children. For these reasons, people should focus on the time students spend on music and art.
It is a common belief that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
are not necessary to be compulsory in the school program.
However
, I
absolutely
believe that these fields should
be noticed
at school and become an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
part of the development of children.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
lessons
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
more comfortable and united. After studying the stressful natural science classes such as Math, Chemistry and Biology that require thinking
continuously
, 45 minutes to learn to draw or sing is a time for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to relax and communicate with each other. By way of example, they can share about the favorite songs and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
knowledge.
As a result
, it is an excellent method for parents and teachers to understand more about their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
, and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
also
feel closer to adults.
In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
classes completely play a significant role in the education of children.

On top of that
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
lead
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to develop the abstract thinking
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them gain more knowledge about various cultures around the world.
Firstly
,
Did you mean "this lesson" or "these lessons"?
these lesson
are useful for the growth of the imagination and Emotional Quotient of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
. This
also
has a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
impact on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
in other subjects in the scheme.
Moreover
, through the history of works of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
can know about the unique cultures.

To sum up,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
have numerous benefits on the growth of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. For these reasons,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
should focus on the time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
spend on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
.
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IELTS essay nkasnclksc;lsamfc;m ;pnmd

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
251 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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