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Newspapers and magazines will not be available in the near future because large amounts of information from the internet will replace them. Do you agree or disagree? Give some examples from your own experience. v.4

Newspapers and magazines will not be available in the near future because large amounts of information from the internet will replace them. Give some examples from your own experience. v. 4
In this era,  we can see how fast the information move from one place to another.  We can  easily grab a newspaper,  a magazine,  or even browse the internet to find out the latest news.   Some people believe that the presence of internet will eliminate the need of newspapers and  magazines.  Meanwhile,  some others argue that all of them will never substitute each other. The significant growth of internet has indeed brought priceless advantages to our life.  Internet  can provide us up‐to‐date news at an incredibly fast pace than any other conventional media  like newspaper and magazine can achieve.  Next on,  by opting to gather news via the internet,   we could help save our environment since we can reduce the number of resource used to  produce the paper. Meanwhile,  looking at from another standpoint,  first of all,  it is really too‐good‐to‐be‐true to  have everyone in this world reading news via the internet.  In reality,  there are still a lot of  people out there who prefer to get information from newspaper and magazine.  This has been  caused by,  but not limited to,  the fact that reading news through the internet is too tiring since  we have to keep our eyes staring at monitor over and over.  Furthermore,  we cannot also fully  trust any information spread out in the internet as everyone can put up any news as they wish. That way,  to some extent,  the information printed in the magazine and newspaper seems to  be more trustable since it has passed through a number of strict procedures. In conclusion,  nowadays everyone has a variety of choices to get the news and information.   Therefore,  all things considered,  I believe that the role of magazine and newspaper will be  irreplaceable for now and ever.  I strongly convinced that they are more complementing than  substituting each other.
In this era,
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
we can 
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
 how 
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
 the information 
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
 from one place to another.  We can
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
easily
 grab a newspaper,
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
a magazine,
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
or even browse the internet to find out the latest news.
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
 
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
 believe that the presence of internet will eliminate the need of newspapers and
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
magazines.  Meanwhile,
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
 others argue that all of them will never substitute each other.

The significant growth of internet has 
indeed
 brought priceless advantages to our life.  Internet
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
can provide us 
Possible spelling mistake found.
up‐to‐date
 news at an 
incredibly
 
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
 pace than any other conventional media
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
like newspaper and magazine can achieve.  
Next
 on,
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
by opting to gather news via the internet,
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
we could 
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
 save our environment since we can 
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
 the number of resource 
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
 to
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
produce the paper.

Meanwhile,
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
looking at from another standpoint,
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
first of all
,
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
it is 
really
 too‐
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
‐to‐be‐true to
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
have everyone in this world reading news via the internet.  In reality,
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
there are 
still
 a lot of
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
 out there who prefer to 
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
 information from newspaper and magazine.  This has been
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
caused by,
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
 not limited to,
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
the fact that reading news through the internet is too tiring since
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
we have to 
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
 our eyes staring at monitor over and over.  
Furthermore
,
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
we cannot 
also
 
fully
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
trust any information spread out 
The usual collocation for technology is "on," not "in." It is better to say this: "on the internet".
in the internet
 as everyone can put up any news as they wish.

That way,
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
to 
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
 extent,
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
the information printed in the magazine and newspaper seems to
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
be more trustable since it has passed through a number of strict procedures.

In conclusion,
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
nowadays everyone has a variety of choices to 
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
 the news and information.
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
Therefore
,
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
all things considered,
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
I believe that the role of magazine and newspaper will be
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
irreplaceable for 
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
 and ever.  I 
strongly
 convinced that they are more complementing than
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
substituting each other.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
37Mistakes

IELTS essay Newspapers and magazines will not be available in the near future because large amounts of information from the internet will replace them. Give some examples from your own experience. v. 4

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
49 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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