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New technology benefits the society

New technology benefits the society pJGp3
The 21st century has been called the era of science and technology, especially with the new technology developments and advancements over the last few decades. I completely agree that there are many benefits of new technology on society as a whole. Firstly, technology plays an important role in society today because of its effects on the way individuals communicate. It determines how people interact with each other on a daily basis. New technology brought many new methods of electronic communication. For example, you can facetime a person that lives on the other side of the world by using social networking. Recent researches show that email is an indispensable part of work since much of business communication occurs via email in today’s digital world. Secondly, modern technology is made learning easier, more interactive, and almost no longer geographical barriers. Students who learn online can easier access almost all learning materials such as lectures, books, video tutorials, etc. That means it helps you better access resources. People can access learning through YouTube and social media. This helps students learn better than sitting down for lectures and reading from textbooks. Finally, the new technological advancements that were made in the health industry have helped people safer and healthier. new technology can help treat better sick people and consequently save many lives especially during the current outbreak of covid. Furthermore, there are many innovative apps on smartphones that help people to watch their weight, heart rate, and other health properties at any time of the day. In conclusion, new technology makes an enormously positive impact on our society. I hope researchers continue to develop more modern technologies to make day-to-day life better.
The 21st century has
been called
the era of science and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
,
especially
with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
developments and advancements over the last few decades. I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
benefits of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
on society as a whole.

Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
plays an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role in society
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of its effects on the way individuals communicate. It determines how
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
interact with each other on a daily basis.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
New
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
brought
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
methods of electronic communication.
For example
, you can
Possible spelling mistake found.
facetime
a person that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
on the other side of the world by using social networking. Recent researches
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
that email is an indispensable part of work since much of business communication occurs via email in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s digital world.

Secondly
, modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
is made
learning easier, more interactive, and almost no longer geographical barriers. Students who learn online can easier access almost all learning materials such as lectures, books, video tutorials, etc. That means it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
you
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
access resources.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
can access learning through YouTube and social media. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
students learn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
than sitting down for lectures and reading from textbooks.

Finally
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
technological advancements that
were made
in the health industry have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helped
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
safer and healthier.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
treat
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
sick
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and
consequently
save
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
especially
during the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
outbreak of
Did you mean "COVID-19" or the alternative spelling "Covid-19" (= coronavirus)?
covid
.
Furthermore
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
innovative apps on smartphones that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
their weight, heart rate, and other health properties at any time of the day.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
an
enormously
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
impact on our society. I hope researchers continue to develop more modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
day-to-day life
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
.
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IELTS essay New technology benefits the society

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
278 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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