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New technologies and ways of buying and selling are transforming the lives of consumers. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

It is fact that technology has changed the way of purchasing with the benefit of consumers. I believe that technology has developed and simplified the live of consumers, giving more capabilities to sell. First of all, technology has shared new methods of selling by the internet. Now, it requires only a registration on website to sell anything throughout the world. whereas some years ago there was need to print lots of advertisements about your product and post them on the special wall. Technology has given special websites where consumers can see the picture of the product and read the review of it. Some websites like AliExpress have gone so far that they have virtual dressing room, where the chosen product will be attached to your body through the camera. They have developed their technologies and changed the way of international shopping. Furthermore, technology gave the product safety, this means that consumer can be calm of their product because there are special tracking numbers and special websites where consumers can follow their products online 24 for 7. Also, consumers are able to return the product If it doesn't suit to them or if it is different from the photo. In addition, with the internet access consumers are able to adjust prices for yourself, choosing the cheapest product or the most expensive. Because due to the internet the competition between sellers is high and therefore the prices of goods are low. Last but not least benefit of the technology is buying without leaving the sofa, because since the development of technology the delivery became very common among consumers and sailers, in consequence it leads to extensive opportunity to buy or sell something. To conclude, the technology has considerably changed the me
It is fact that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
the way of purchasing with the benefit of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
consumers
. I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
has developed and simplified the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
consumers
, giving more capabilities to sell.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
has shared new methods of selling by the internet.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Now
, it requires
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
a registration on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
website
to sell anything throughout the world.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
whereas
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
years ago there
was need
to print lots of advertisements about your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
and post them on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
special
wall.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Technology
has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
special
websites where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
consumers
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
the picture of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
and read the review of it.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
websites like AliExpress have gone
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
far that they have virtual dressing room, where the chosen
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
will
be attached
to your body through the camera. They have developed their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
the way of international shopping.

Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
gave the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
safety, this means that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
consumer
can be calm of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
there are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
special
tracking numbers and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
special
websites where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
consumers
can follow their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
online 24 for 7.
Also
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
consumers
are able to return the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
If it doesn't suit to them or if it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
from the photo.

In addition
, with the internet access
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
consumers
are able to adjust prices for yourself, choosing the cheapest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
or the most expensive.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
due to the internet
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
the


This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
competition
between sellers is high and
therefore
the prices of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
are low.

Last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not
A determiner is probably missing here: "the least".
least
benefit of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
is buying without leaving the sofa,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
since the development of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
the delivery became
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
common among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
consumers
and
Possible spelling mistake found.
sailers
, in consequence it leads to extensive opportunity to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
or sell something.

To conclude
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
has
considerably
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
Possible typo. Did you mean "the" or "me"?
the me
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IELTS essay New technologies and ways of buying and selling are transforming the lives of consumers. with this opinion?

Essay
  American English
7 paragraphs
288 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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