Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

National costume or traditional wears of a particular country are in important part of the culture of the country, but with globalization of culture and other exchange taking place, now they seem to be losing important to what extent do you agree to this s v.1

National costume or traditional wears of a particular country are in important part of the culture of the country, but with globalization of culture and other exchange taking place, now they seem to be losing important 1
Health care is one of the fundamental principles a person should follow in their daily life. The health care depending on the person either he follows the healthy practice or unhealthy practice throughout their life. In the following paragraphs, I will discuss why people are not doing exercise that leading to the health problem and what to do to tackle this serious issue. In this era, where there is so much advancement of a technology involves people in various different tasks rather than focusing on the healthy exercises to avoid the health related problems. Usually people waste their time in using social media or playing games instead of going to the gym. For example, In third world countries, where people are not awarded about the importance of their health so they usually do not bother to go to the gym to do an exercise to gain healthy benefits. To eradicate this problem, An education about health benefits should be focused rather than advertising unhealthy practices. Most effective ways to reduce the health problems is to aware people about healthy and unhealthy practices so they can differentiate them easily. For example, In first world countries, The government usually advertises healthy practices resulting increase in awareness among people leading them to do the exercise daily despite their busy schedule. To sum up, It will solely depend on how they brought up and what are their moral values. So as a result, some people will prefer to exercise and some will not. Regardless of the moral values and how they brought up still people choose the lifestyle which attracts them.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Health
care is one of the fundamental principles a person should follow in their daily life. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
care depending on the person either he follows the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
practice
or unhealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
practice
throughout their life. In the following paragraphs, I will discuss why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are not doing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
that leading to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
and what to do to tackle this serious issue.

In this era, where there is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
much advancement of a technology involves
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in various
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
tasks
rather
than focusing on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercises
to avoid the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
related
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
.
Usually
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
waste their time in using social media or playing games
instead
of going to the gym.
For example
, In third world countries, where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are not awarded about the importance of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they
usually
do not bother to go to the gym to do an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
to gain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
benefits.

To eradicate this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
, An education about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
benefits should
be focused
rather
than advertising unhealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
practices
. Most effective ways to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
is to aware
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
and unhealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
practices
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they can differentiate them
easily
.
For example
, In
first
world countries, The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
usually
advertises
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
practices
resulting increase in awareness among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
leading them to do the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
daily despite their busy schedule.

To sum up, It will
solely
depend on how they brought up and what are their moral values.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
as a result
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will prefer to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
will not. Regardless of the moral values and how they brought up
still
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
choose the lifestyle which attracts them.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay National costume or traditional wears of a particular country are in important part of the culture of the country, but with globalization of culture and other exchange taking place, now they seem to be losing important 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
267 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts